Wednesday, October 2, 2013

take on the difference in classes

a few weeks ago, while flying back from Eastern Europe for 10 hours, I realized just how much better the guys taking a left when they get onto an airplane have it relative to the ones taking a right.

I've flown my fair share of business class flights, but will almost always opt for the coach option knowing that a few hours of misery is often not worth the three fold price jump.     Domestically I get upgraded about 60% of the time anyway and on most international flights, my status gets me at least my choice of bulk-head or emergency exit, unless they have an economy comfort, which I'll always opt for.

The only issue with Economy comfort is that, since you are you sitting in the front of the economy section, all the bathrooms for your section are in the back on the 777 planes.    I don't mind stretching my legs a bit and really prefer to be as far from that smell as possible but there is one drawback..  when the food-service is coming down the aisle, you can't get to the bathroom.

Like I said, I'd been in Eastern Europe for three days and was going on about 3 hours of sleep when I got onto the plane but all hell broke loose when my stomach started doing flips from the raw-sushi I had, 1500 kilometers from the nearest ocean.   
With the beverage carts blocking my only bathroom option, I asked the stewardess in business class, if I could use the bathroom up there...

Righetti..  I know this is usually not allowed, but  can I use the bathroom up here
Stewardess  "the FAA doesn't allow for cross cabin travel, it's a security issue"
Righetti   I understand this but I can't get past the lady pushing the food cart to the only bathrooms are all the way in the back
Stewardess  it's a security issue
Righetti    what happens if somebody from over there wanted to use our bathroom?
Stewardess  that would be OK
Righetti  "no security issue there?"
Stewardess  yes
Righetti   yes a security issue or yes, no security issue
Stewardess  yes
Righetti  why would the FAA care about classes?
Stewardess  sorry it's from Homeland Security
Righetti  same difference
Stewardess  yes
Righetti  i have to pee from my ass, I might do it in the middle of your aisle
Stewardess  No





It's like a walking episode of Curb

2 comments:

Mr. R. Lee said...

Mmmm, Eastern Europe. Nice.

I've heard and read good things about Poland, Lithuania, and the Ukraine. Especially Odessa.

Zed said...

Your SOP on these flights should be to take some Pepto Bismol BEFORE you takeoff. Stuff yourself up for a good 12 hours.