Saturday, December 9, 2017

Take on the DC consumer in charge

Our president spends 4-8 hours watching TV and puts down a dozen DC's per day. This sounds a lot like SuperBowl Sunday for a couple of my buddies but even those slobs only do that once per year. This guy leads the free world and brags about his awesome TiVO machine so he can orgasm over Fox and Friends after Hate-Watching Morning Joe
But a dozen diet cokes is insane, those 1 calories apparently add up because Trump looks like he ate a small car and every time you see him, he gets fatter and fatter
The chances of this guy pulling a William He Roy Harrison while laying in bed with a bag of Cheetos and a Big Gulp have to be somewhere in the 80% range, somebody put him on a diet or we'll be stuck with Pence.

Friday, December 8, 2017

Take on old Lindsey

When I first hear about Lindsey Graham he was just this dude who always seemed to hang it with John McCain. He didn't say much and you just heard that he was some Hawk but even that always seemed like overcompensating for the fact he lived with his mother and their combined 50 cats.

You didn't learn much about him during his campaign when he mostly spent time at the kiddy table but he did, at least, come across a sensible critic when it came to Trump.
As McCain's gotten older and more frail, Lindsey seemed to have tried to take the spotlight but it now seems his affections aren't for Old John but instead his eyes are now gazing right at the Orange Cheetah in the White House. He lead a failed attempt at repealing ObamaCare with McCain dropping his support like a hot potato, he went golfing with Trump and now he's hawking the whole Fusion GPS thing. He has officially gone off the deep end.

This is what happens when you get into Trump's crazy orbit, with the rest of the world starts running away, old Lindsey gets pulled in harder

Thursday, December 7, 2017

Take on Sarah Sloth Sanders

Big Huck was back on the podium today and somehow was able to shove her gigantic foot past her gigantic belly and into her gigantic mouth, or at least that is what I hope. She said today that Trump would be fine with anti-gay signs at restaurants which seems like the thing that would have been cool to say in 1957, maybe. This is the president of the United States saying that discrimination is fine and vile signs are ok too. Forget whether it's legally right, it certainly is morally repugnant but then again that is par for the course with this man and his posse of grime.
But what was also noticeable is how incredibly weird looking Big Huck has gotten, she makes these Jim Carrey faces without even trying where somehow her one eye dropped below her nose-line. It's really very disturbing. She looks like sloth from Goonies

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Take on President Dentures

For all the hoopla about today's brain dead announcement of announcing that the US will now recognize Jerusalem as the capital as Israel, that wasn't the most Trump thing of the afternoon. It also wasn't the new reveal about Michael Flynn or even the testimony of Eric Prince. The most Trump part of the day that it appeared he lost his crappy dentures right towards the end of his poorly constructed, meandering speech about Israel. It was the weirdest thing as he all of a sudden went Weird Al in Smells like Teen Nirvana.

Either that or he has a stroke mid sentence, either way, kind of weird and he'll be especially pissy when the MSM gets a hold of these stories

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Take on subway Times

I'm standing on the subway today and staring at the wall and for the life of me, I can't figure out why they call them subway tiles. Subway tiles are these long rectangular things people put in their showers to look hip and urban but when you look at actual tiles in a subway station they are square and grimy which isn't the look you might be going for when you are hoping to get clean.

So please, rename those things as rectangular tiles and call the little square ones subway tiles...but only if they are covered in homeless juice

Monday, December 4, 2017

Take on Roy Moore, US Senator

A few weeks ago it seemed that Alabamanians -which I assume are Armenian hicks- were going to send Roy Moore packing but the closer we get, the more obvious it is that Alabama voters will send him to Washington
Our president, an accused sex offender, has no issue with the accusations, which is not surprising since he only believes accusations made agains Democrats and CNN anchors. We all know Trump has no morality, so his endorsement is one of the most predictable things this side of Trump saying something stupid. But this is where it gets interesting, the GOP establishment who first tried to shun Moore, has quietly turned around and are now fully behind a guy who strolled around the mall picking up girls in training bras.
Nice job 'merica.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Take on Trump’s Access Hollywood denial

Sarah Sanders doesn't think we need to have the Access Hollywood conversation again because it was already litigated and ruled on with the 2016 election. If that's the case, it's a bit odd that her boss is the one trying to put doubt into its authenticity but then again, consistency is not either of their strong suits.
But as Big Huck tries to sweep this under the rug, you wonder why politicians seems to be the only ones getting a pass. Although they all looked the other way for ever, since the #MeToo movement, the news media has ruled quickly and decisively, so has the entertainment industry. Big business has taken down some people but the only one who has avoided having their lives altered are the politicians and no one has skated more than Donald J Trump.
Glad to see Billy Bush came to clarify the entire thing.

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Take on two Fillet O Fish and two Big Macs

The Washington Post in it's quest to keep democracy from dying in darkness, had an article today about the upcoming book from Corey Lewendowski which describes his time as Trump's campaign manager before Paulie Walnuts took over

The best thing about the article was when he deceived a typical meal for The Don. Two Fillet O fish and two Big Macs. I'm all for a Big Mac but putting down two after putting down the Fillet O Fish is ridiculous. Our president is so incredibly obese that the image of him laying on his gold faux down comforter on his water bed surrounded by McDonalds wrappers and Big Gulps sound about right.

Takkemon the new bill

We'll have to pass the bill so we can read it. Tonight the GOP is ready to pass the biggest overall of our tax code but we're just hoping they don't step on a landmine before they do so.
But nothing instills more confidence that the final bill being written in pen with inserts, corrections and typos. But then again, this is a party who asked for transparency is now pushing for a big kick back to the donor class, so joe Q six pack can get a case of Miller lite and watch the demise of our country

Glad to be of help

Thursday, November 30, 2017

Take on Merry Christmas

With the senate on the verge of voting for the Tax Plan, Bob Mueller getting closer and closer to the prize, the Sexy Rexy stuff coming out and the fat man in North Korea trying to have a whose got a bigger Dick competition, our Dear Leader spent today telling everybody how good it feels to say Merry Christmas again. Trees can be cut down again, jingle balls can be jingled, Starbucks cups can have holiday spirits because our president has allowed us to embrace the birth of Jesus again. I don't remember when we weren't allowed to say it, but if he said it was outlawed, it likely was.
So now that this has been reestablished, I'm going to make my Christmas wishlist

- Michael Flynn flips
- takes out Jared Kushner
- Trump appoints Chris Christie as special counselor to prosecute Kushner
- Kushner flips and sends Don to take his place
- Pence in his jubilation falls on a banana peel taking out Orrin Hatch, Paul Ryan and everybody else in line


Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night

Take on the list

When Louis CK was a creep I sort of shrugged
When Al Franken was one, I cringed
When Matt Lauer was one I didn't know what to do. Matt Lauer was vanilla as ice cream on the jersey shore in rob summer, nothing made me expect this bombshell but in 2017 nothing surprises me

But in this day and age nothing -or nobody- should surprise me

I have put together a list of people who would devastate me

-Obama
-Colbert
-Chuck Todd

Obama because it would destroy all I know about him
Colbert because my dark horse for 2020
Would be shot
Chuck Todd because it might prove that stupid goatee doesn't make him repulsive to women

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

Take on Chuck and Nancy

Our president did what he did best today in the face of a Korean TreaT that has never seemed more imminent. Be took to Twitter and berated a bunch of old democrats. The photo-op of him sitting in front of two empty chairs was certainly cringe worthy but the way his inner circle is looking, it might be some creepy foreshadowing. At the end of the day Crazy Chuck and Fancy Nancy appealed to their base in the same way Little Don did for his and now we're all in a waiting game for another -predictable- game of debt limit chicken

Can't we just enjoy the holidays?!?

Monday, November 27, 2017

Take on Pocahontas

The world is going nuts about the Pocahontas thing and for the first time in forever, I kind of shrug. Yeah, it was in poor taste to use that language while honoring Native American code talkers but this is kind of what you signed up for when you elected Trump. The reference is actually a pretty good one and a good political zinger against a senator who did claim some Cherokee heritage because her great grandmother was once engaged to a Native American.

The one thing that Trump is genuinely good at is nicknames, he's the ultimate high school bully but when he gets a good one, it usually does for really well. Nobody emasculated Rubio more than Trump with his Little Marco rub or painted Cruz into weasel better than the Lyin' Ted monicker. Crooked Hillary, Low Energy Jeb! and Might want to stop with two Big Macs Christie were all perfectly played.

Calling Elizabeth Warren Pocahontas is more of the same. Yeah it's childish but in his defense, it's effective and I actually don't see it as a slur. To me it's similar to calling a dummy, Einstein or a four year old artist Picasso as an iBuddy pointed out. Its insulting to the person but not the legacy. It's not a slur anymore that calling some crappy white basketball player Jordan would be to black people. It's an insult and one that plays right at Trump's grade-school humor, it's most telling that the only Native American he could name is one from a Disney movie.
What is more insulting is that Trump's ceremony was held under the watchful eye of Andrew Jackson's portrait, the optics of which are just dumbfounding.

Sunday, November 26, 2017

Take on The NY Times Nazi piece.

The world is in an uproar about the article in the Times which they say normalizes naziism in 2017. I read the article, before knowing the criticism and actually found it to be interesting. I get that we need to hate everything nazi but seeing that these animals live right amongst us is actually a bigger lesson. In his political climate, extremist views seem to have become more normalized anyway, the alt-right has a seat at the table, Sebastian Gorka was an advisor to the president of the United States. People are more comfortable coming out of the shadows and hating Jews, blacks and gays and I do think it's important to analyze why and how that is allowed to happen.

I remember during one of the last seasons of Breaking Bad when they got involved in the entire white supremacy story line that I thought it sort of jumped the shark because it was just so unbelievable that this culture even existed, little did anybody know that it was just bubbling up right underneath the top layer
With that said, all the criticism the NYT gets for being too liberal and fake news might finally be getting to them and I wonder if this was a tactical decision to be able to point to when the next volley comes in from Tweeter in Chief

Saturday, November 25, 2017

Take on the Frozen thing before Coco

I spent yesterday afternoon at the movies having decided to see Coco. I did appreciate that the entire movie was going to have an underlying anti Trump message as some Mexican kid was being held out of the country by some fictional wall while his family was trying to get him back. The movie started a bit slow but got pretty good when little Miguel beats up the fat egotistical self indulgent small handed dickhead who is the de facto head of the dark side.
I'd expected a bit better music, an easier to follow storyline and a more young kid friendly character but it wasn't a terrible way to spend 2 hours the day after thanksgiving.

But what was a terrible thing was this horrible surprise Frozen short film they showed before hand. First of all, nobody warned you that we went from an hour and forty minute movie to one now topping two hours, which with three kids in tow is a big deal. Secondly, you are going into a movie which is a mix between Ricky Ricardo meets the Addams Family and get stuck with this Elsa drivel, it's not the same audience and certainly not what your expectations are
But what really sucks is that this short film was just horrible. It was drawn out, poorly scripted, badly performed with horrible music and had a story line which made you want to shove an ice pick into your Arendelle. My eight year old looked at me at one point and said "I want to talk to the manager"

Disney, you aren't doing your brand any service by forcing this crap down our throats. The Frozen boat has sailed, stop trying to force it, you had your chance to capitalize on it -and did- but you waited too long, nobody cares anymore and if Frozen 2 is going to be anything like this, you are in for a rude awaking

Friday, November 24, 2017

Take on Time Magazines man of the year

Time Magazine either did or did not offer to make Trump it's mannif the year but he either refused the offer or is making the entire thing up. He probably should be the man of the year, TOR for one has devoted almost our entire editorial section to covering his ridiculousness. So I have no doubt he's worthy, worthy in the same way that previous winners have been, for their mere presence. Stalin, Hitler and a few others less than desirables have had the honor as has Trump himself
But his call out is just typical of his thin skinned mentality. They should have made Hillary the cover just to totally break him

Thursday, November 23, 2017

Take ok the Thanksgiving holiday

Mike...Flynn.. has.. flipped..

And now we will finally get to the best part of this thanksgiving feast when Bob Mueller goes after the big fat turkey and carves him up. We all know that Trump's been compromised for years and are finding out exactly how compromised every single day but it's time to stop with the appetizers and to get to the stuffing. We've waited a year and are ready to hear about cranberry sauce and Russian hookers and time to learn exactly how he stole this election and let America go back to having good and bad presidents but not morally, ethically and totally corrupt ones

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Take on the Dick pic.

When you need to take a dick pic from the bottom up because you can't see it from the top down, you might be better off not sending that photo. I don't know who Joe Barton was before today but now his gigantic gut, huge man boobs, stretched out belly button and incredibly small wiener are etched into my mind. I don't think I've ever understood why a dude thinks a woman would want to get a dick-pic, the male junk is one of the least attractive looking things and when you pair it with a beached whale, it probably looks more like a shriveled up hamster than it does normally. Let's hope that Joe Barton does the right thing and take a shotgun to his unit and an ax to his political career

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Take on the Turkey pardon

I may be he only one but I'd love to see Trump not follow tradition here and pardon that Turkey. It would even be better if by executive order he undid the pardons of all of Obama's turkeys and had them slaughtered and fed to Sarah Huckabee Sanders right on the podium


I'd even appreciate it if he did pardon the bird that he coughed "Jeff Sessions" into fist as he said it. Not because that would be the right thing to do, but because SNL and Colbert would have a field day with it.
We are basically living in a banana republic with this guy in charge, might as well make it entertaining.

Monday, November 20, 2017

Take on HW

I really appreciate H.W. Bush and have gained a lot
of respect for him the last few decades but in the last few weeks, that respect has started to slowly drop. His ass grab in a wheelchair at 93 seemed sort of innocent, in a way that an old white man is innocent. But the stories that have come out since have sounded more crappy and less innocent as he has gotten younger and younger in the stories. I get that he grew up in a different time but at some point playing Don Draper seems like a bad decision.
Anyway, today he tweeted something about some veteran in a valiant attempt to win over some public trust and support but the only thing I thought about was. "I wonder if he grabbed that Navy SEALs ass"

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Take on Ball vs Trump

If 2017 hasn't been weird enough, we finally h e hit the crescendo with a heavyweight battle- and I do mean heavyweight- between Donald J Trump and LaVar Ball, two of the most despicable human alive. This is like trying to route for McGregor or Floyd as they are both horrible people but somehow I think I'd take LaVar Ball's side of it, not because he's right (if anybody is right it's probably or cubby president) but because our president is a lunatic and unlike Ball, the worst thing he can do is to raise the price of his shitty sneakers
I hope Ball calls him out on Twitter for a week, trolling him for being a fat moron. A battle royal between Chubby Trump, Kim Jung Un and LaVar Ball would be fantastic

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Take on the anti LGTB guy

Is there anything better than an anti LGBT politician getting caught Twinkie deep in his buddy.  It's got to be the most obvious cover for a guy who's living secret life and nothing makes it more obvious than the guy claiming to be some self righteous religious nut.  The saddest thing is that in this day and age, nobody cares.  The stigma is gone, the world has moved on.  It's why Kevin Spacey's lame "coming out" portion of his apology letter got no traction.  Nobody gives a crap where you stick your winkie , just don't preach about it. 



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Friday, November 17, 2017

Take on Kay Ivey

I wouldn't be able to pick Kay Ivey out of a lineuo that includes Michael Kay, Blue Ivy and that Jared guy from Kay Jewelers but I have now decided she is a disposable piece of dog poo. Why should I hate on poor Kay, because she said today that she's got no reason to not believe Roy Moore's accusers yet she will still vote for him purely because he's a Republican. I get this party over country thing if you are a selfish twit but when you are a person who represents a state maybe keeping your mouth shut is the best way to do that

Nobody believes that without this incident, there like be any chance of turning Alabama blue. You'd have a better chance of Blue Ivy coming into Tuscaloosa or Huntsville and convincing the average citizen there that her dad is the messiah and her mom is The Virgin Mary than them electing a democrat under normal circumstances

Have fun at the mall you inbred losers.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Take on Trump’s Franken comment

Al Franken has embarrassing himself and killed any aspirations he had for higher office. The SNLnator should resign and let us be purged of another one of these scumbags. The ultimate troll job happened when POTUS decided to weigh in, he called Franken out and asked the question what happened after the first tit-grab photo

This is the same guy who told Billy Bush "I'm automatically attracted to beautiful women — I just start kissing them, it's like a magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait. And when you're a star, they let you do it. You can do anything." and a man who has yet to call for Roy Moore to step down, so he doesn't exactly have a lot of credibility left

What the Dems will likely miss if Franken did step down is his intellect and savviness in these back and forth he's displayed over the last few years when shady people come in front of his committees but he has ruined it all

Roy Moore step aside
Al Franken resin
POTUS. Walk away and don't ever look back

Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Take on the new CNN poll.

I got an email from TeamTrump today asking me to rate his performance over the last year. The choices were a Trumpian voice between Good, Great, Okay and Other. This obviously only had one right answer and even that one felt a bit empty. Trump has given nobody confidence in his temperament, decision making, diplomacy, intellect, people skills, management style or statesmanship. The only things he has done well are post grammatically incorrect tweets and deflect attention away from his corruption

The best thing about the email was that it complained about the latest CNN poll which showed that a whopping 64% of people said they had less confidence in Trump than they did a year ago. Their complaint was that only 24% of the people polled were Republicans which -in their opinion- invalidated the poll

Two comments

- I don't think anybody in their right mind can think that he has actually done a great or good job, he's a walking disaster, so this would have to be a vote between Other and Okay

- I just looked it up and in 2016, only 26% of all Americans identified themselves as Republican, so the 24% included in this poll seems right and likely a bit high as many people see a fractured party divided between the McConnell tired turtle establishment and the Trump crazies

Anyway, I was asked to donate after answering "other" which I didn't do.

I'm guessing we'll never have this hard scientific poll see the light of day.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Take on Hannity

We wonder how the heartland of America was fooled by a twice divorced, morally corrupt, New York East Coast elitist. These are the salt of the earth type of people who represent all that is normal and decent, not asking for much, serving our country willingly and always anti coastal. I've thought about what appeals these people to Trump and I finally figured it out. It's that they are enamored by another fast talking slick New Yorker, Sean Hannity. Hannity blurred the lines just enough for these country hicks to believe he was one of them, even when he was pulling in millions on their stupidity. His lead in, Bill O'Reilly did him one better by dumbing down his program with those stupid text boxes next to his gigantic head but Hannity speaks to their soul.
These morons don't even realize that Hannity is playing them like a flute with his dark suits and pink ties. He's a complete lunatic or at least plays one on TV

Monday, November 13, 2017

Take on the Keurig thing.

Nothing pleases me more than seeing a bunch of morons smash their home appliances because they are mad that the company pulled advertising from something as dumb as Hannity!!

But that is why you have, hundreds of people beating their Keurig machines with hammers, tearing them down stairs and filling them with bleach and in the process, accomplishing very little.
The best part was that Nespresso sent out a big email blast today offering 35%off of all their machines

The best thing is that we will have a lot more people buying new appliances this Christmas season, which will be a nice boost to the retail economy

So smash away morons.

Sunday, November 12, 2017

Take on Trump’s Miss Universe riffing

Now he's really gone too far, forget the mindful ignorance of Putin's role, forget his embrace of Duterte, forget his embarrassing name calling thing with The short and fat Rocket Man...the news that shook the world is that Trump rugged the Miss Universe contest in 2002 to give it to Putin's mistress. All is fair in love and war but when you start messing with sanctity of all that is holy, true and good, I'm pissed off. If the Miss Universe contest can't be counted on to be held fairly, then nothing is left to fight for.
Put everything else aside, call Mueller back from his little trip, we need a congressional investigation on this.

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Take on Fat and Short

I've never agreed with Trump more than his "short and fat" description of Kim Jong-un. There really is no better description as Kim is a complete tub of lard. What is even better is that this Trump
outburst was prompted when Kim called him fat which is another great description because Trump looks like a Turkey day balloon

Anyway, I'm glad these two morons spent the day insulting each other, let's hope they don't annihilate each other while I'm alive

Friday, November 10, 2017

Take on the hooker pee

Trump's security chief testified earlier this week about many things including the infamous trip
To Moscow back in 2013. What was interesting was that he not only acknowledged that there was an offer for five hookers to be sent up to Trump's suite but that he remembered very clearly that no impropriety occurred while her was there. The emphasis is obviously on the legal CYA (cover your ass) portion of while he was present.

What is more interesting is how this story has evolved

We went from
- the Dossier is so preposterous that it's not worth discussing

to

- you are just covering for Clinton's huge loss

to

- the Dossier was paid for by Clinton, so it's contents are obviously compromised.

To

- ok there were hookers but we didn't indulge


At thus rate Adam Schildkraut will be up to his elbows in hooker pee by this time next week.

Thursday, November 9, 2017

Take on that weird thumbs up photo

Trump tweeted out a weird photo the other night with the caption 
Congratulations to all of the 'DEPLORABLES' and the millions of people who gave us a MASSIVE (304-227) Electoral College landslide victory

It was sort of an odd photo considering the rest of the GOP was licking their wounds after getting their asses handed to them on Tuesday but Trump doesn't care about anybody but himself

But looking at this photo

Kushner looks like he's high
Stephen Miller looks like he's pulling a H.W. Bush on Hope Hicks
The fat guy on the bottom looks like he's taking a dump
And the media guy Dan Scavino looks like he forgot his hair brush at the hotel in Seoul 

And Trump, he looks like he just had passed gas and only he is in on the joke





Sent from my iPhone

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Take on Bo Dietl

If there was ever a walk-over victory it was last night when Bill De Blasio easily won a second term defeating Nicole Malliotakis by an overwhelming margin of 66% to 28%.   It's not that surprising being that NYC is a traditional liberal powerhouse although the one place the republicans have always done well is with the mayor race.  

But what is more odd is that throughout the campaign, the person we heard more about than anybody was Bo Dietl.  Dietl is a contributor to FoxNews and the Imus in the Morning program, so he has some name recognition.  So much recognition that there was a debate a week ago and he was on the stage with De Blasio and Malliotakis

How the hell did the election commission give him that platform?  This guy got 1% of the vote which is about the equivalent of getting a 400 on the SAT's.  The only person who got less votes than him is a guy who literally tried to hijack a plane (http://nypost.com/2017/10/25/this-mayoral-candidate-once-tried-to-hijack-an-airplane/).  The guy who finished above him is a movie producer who was doing this as a shtick. 

De Blasio got more votes in a combo of three or four buildings than Diedl got in total

Let's just hope Bo just goes away for good now









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Tuesday, November 7, 2017

Take on Huck

Sarah Sanders spent the day in Korea trying to explain the latest Presidential gaffe that could lead to a potential international crisis. But the only thing I could think of was she looks like a Cabbage Patch Kid who mated with a GI Joe. Most of the time you look at presidents snd see them age tremendously over their term, in this case it is the press secretary who looks like she's gone from 40 something to 60 something in a hot minute. It's weird because she's added these wrinkles which normally does give a woman a certain handsome eloquence but not for her. But she's somehow found a way to get fat in her wrinkles, her face kind of looks like a catcher's mitt if that catcher's mitt married a bulldog.
She's really a disgusting looking human both inside and outside

Monday, November 6, 2017

Take on the Carter Page testimony

This is the week that Mike Flynn gets indicted unless, of course, he has already flipped and this is he week Mueller starts to tighten his grip around the neck of the administration. Carter Page certainly did his part in his free wheedling, attorney-less afternoon in from of Adam Schiff last week and the twisted tangled Russian web just got a bit further exposed. For a campaign who claimed to have no Russian involvement, they certainly visited Russia
a lot, certainly met with a lot of Russian officials and certainly had a lot of hookers pee on sheets

How did we let this man become president?

Sunday, November 5, 2017

The Saudi house cleaning

The last two days of the Kingdom of Saud hVe felt like the ending to Goodfellas. Basically the new crown prince decided to play Layla and within 24 hours he had arrested every one of his rivals and cousins. The most Saudi part of the arrests were that they threw all of these corrupt princes into the toughest prison know the world, the Ritz Carlton which cancelled all other hotel reservations through December 31st.
Today another prince died when his helicopter crashed. If I'm a Saudi Prince, I'm not sure I'm starting my car tomorrow

I'm sure Trump is watching and admiring the entire thing

Saturday, November 4, 2017

Take on Pocahontas

Just this week Donald J Trump signed the following declaration.  

Native Americans are a testament to the deep importance of culture and vibrancy of traditions, passed down throughout generations. This month, I encourage all of our citizens to learn about the rich history and culture of the Native American people.

NOW, THEREFORE, I, DONALD J. TRUMP, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and the laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim November 2017 as National Native American Heritage Month.


Elizabeth Warren must be so proud 





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Friday, November 3, 2017

Take on the 60 million fake Facebook accounts

Facebook now admits that up to 60,000,000 of its accounts are fake which likely means the number is 3x that. Just think about that, the most popular social media website with all this meteoric growth is just one army of bots, trolls and idiot cousins. They were the main platform for such atrocities as election interference, racist bots and kitten pictures


Years ago there was an article describing Facebook as a necessity, like electricity but somehow I've been able to stay off the grid and am no worse for the wear.
If this last election doesn't show you there cesspool that this place is, nothing will.

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Take on Donna Brazile

Donna Brazile went after the DNC, the Clinton's and the democratic establishment in her new book which promised to be the biggest bombshell of the year and it will be available just in time for Christmas
I think that most of the world is ready for Hillary to just go away, she lost, she ran a terrible campaign and she is incredibly unlikeable but yet it feel like we are going to regurgitate the campaign a hundred times between now and 2020
But the thing that was more obvious -and frankly obnoxious- about the Brazile thing is that it just feels so self serving. The entire piece is about what she felt and noticed and how she knew Hillary was in trouble. Yet she did nothing about any of it at any point

Anyway, Donna Brazile and Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton and that weird VP guy she chose. Plead all of you guys go away

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Take on the Facebook troll

3000 Facebook ads linked to Russia were released today and sadly each one is probably one that your  wife's idiot cousin posted.
I haven't been on Facebook in years, recognizing it for the cesspool it is, but from everything I hear, this last year+ has been particularly miserable. The old adage of not discussing religion or politics in public went to hell and you people all realized that you hate half of your Facebook friends.

The funny thing is thing is that everybody I know says the same thing about the vile rhetoric that was being spewed, they all say it was posted by either

- some nutty in-law
- some kind they went to high school with who likely works in a pizzeria or for the DPW

Sadly those morons represented half of this country and now we're stuck with Donald Duck

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Take on only the best people

George Papadapolous has gone from a guy nobody (other than Seth Abramson) had ever heard of to a guy who everybody has heard of to a guy Trump claims to have barely heard of in about a two day period
I don't know much about the insights into situations like this but I do know that when a campaign announces that a 29 year old kid with no experience will serve as a member of a national security advisory team, that kid better have been born on February 29th.
Did Trump know he was trying to get a meeting with Putin, who the hell knows but there were plenty in the campaign orbit who did and now it's time for those chickens to come home to roost

Papadapolous flipped, Flynn likely flipped, Manafort has been indictees, Page is as crazy as ever, Bannon is living in a bunker, Kushner is solving the Middle East issue over a latte and Roger Stone is from perma-banned from Twitter. Somehow the Mooch got out just in time.

Monday, October 30, 2017

Take on Kevin Spacey

lost in today's wonderful Goodfellas ending is this Kevin Spacey story

Spacey, like most of powerful Hollywood apparently, has been sexually harassing anybody in their orbit but unlike the rest of them, Spacey tried to blame it all on a drunken stupor and then used the opportunity to reveal the biggest open secret in Hollywood.    Spacey is a private person and is only coming out now because he's trying to cover up for something that is actually a scandal.  

This entire thing is sickening, mostly because Spacey took no real responsibility for his act, tried to cover it up with a booze story and then tried to change the dialogue by using this platform to try to get sympathy by coming out.  Oh by the way, Anthony Rapp was 14 at the time.. 
   
- I hated his  'I chose to live myself as a gay man' this isn't helpful.
- the fact that he's gay and or drunk is no excuse for making an unwanted pass at somebody below him
- the fact that he's gay and or drunk is no excuse for him making a pass at a minor


screw Kevin Spacey and his house of cards


Sunday, October 29, 2017

Take on the golfer in chief

As Donald Trump left the Trump National Golf Club in Virginia this Sunday, we wonder how may good golf weekends he has left. The weather should be getting colder although with this climate who the heck knows anymore. I'd feel bad for Trump but this won't mean the end of his golf season, it'll just mean he moves it down about 1000 miles to Mar-a-Lago. This will certainly impact him as it will mean less time with his wife and kid who are just adjusting to DC and will also mean that we're likely to get some more military plans drawn up on napkins in front of the help.
But maybe Mueller can move fast and go right for the jugular and allow Trump to go back to playing golf without all the stress of a nuclear catastrophe.

By the way, if tomorrow's indictment reveals it's Kushner, I really hope they let Christie prosecute him.

Saturday, October 28, 2017

Take on the rumor

So the rumors about who the first to fall will be are all over the place
Many pin it on Flynn, who has been exposed as the one with the most blood on his hands including the photo of him dining with Putin
Manafort has been in the news a lot with secret ledgers and a history of deals with Russia
Carter Page is said to have delivered the message directly from Trump to Putin
Don jr. arranged the meeting with the Russian attorney
Roger Stone is a weasel who nobody would mind seeing fried

But the person who is now most likely to fall is the quiet one. Rumor is that Kushner will be the first to fall, because of his association with Cambridge Analytics. This will be the best one and will irk the president to no end and will mean that Mueller is inches away from the big Tuna.

It's always the quiet one.

Friday, October 27, 2017

Take on the timing of the Mueller news

We've waited for what feels like an eternity but finally the first of many shoes is going to drop. The first charges were filed by Robert Mueller and now the question is who is the first one to go down

Page, Flynn, Manafort, Papadapolous, Don Jr


Please god let it be Don jr.

But I guess we now know why Trump wanted to make sure the JFK stuff was released today.

take on the frozen iphone

Last night, as I was sitting guard outside my daughter's room to protect her against monsters and zombies, I had the most unfortunate thing happened to me.   My IPhone froze up.   I'm sitting in the dark with a busted IPhone and it was maddening.  

Maddening because there was nothing I could do.   When I pressed the side button and the home button it would eventually get to the screen where you had to swipe to power down the phone, but the screen wouldn't allow for the powder down.   So I was stuck, staring at a blank screen for hours

The only thing that worked was Siri, which allowed me to get my text messages dictated to me but nothing else.  
Without a hard reset option like taking the battery out, I was stuck with the unthinkable.   Let me iphone battery die for a reset, the issue was that the phone still had 20% battery and without any use, draining it was painful

It took 12 hours to finally die and rebooted thirty seconds later.

 

Sorry for the lack of TOR yesterday, without a phone it was near impossible, we'll make this a Friday Double...  so Trump isn't safe yet

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Take on the standing ovation for Trump

I'm not sure if your heard but Trump got a standing ovation from the GOP leadership in some closed session of unity. He only tweeeted about it half a dozen time, nothing about specifics but just that the GOP lathered him with praise, we'll except for Flake, Corker, McCain and I guess maybe Graham. But the rest of those guys just love them some Donald J Trump. Well Cruz and Rubio both have have a bit of a hard history with El Trumpio and Mitch "his Bitch" McConnell is a bit of a wild card towards the all in for Trump thing unless he likes the role of whipping boy, which he might.
Then there is Ben Sasse who might not be a total spineless weasel. The Murkowski and Collins duo have had their wars with Trump, too as hey vote against the repeal thing. And then you have Rand who hates everybody and everybody hates him.

Jesus, who actually likes this guy?!?

I'm counting 11 our of 52 who have some bad history but I'm sure they all applauded loudly for him during their standing O

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Take on Tom Perez

I often wonder what the qualifications for DNC chair are supposed to be and have figured out that you basically need a pulse -and not a very good one-, a weird set of vocal cords and the ability to be bought off and be completely corrupt. It's no surprise that they never seem to have trouble filling the position

There is no more tone deaf moron than Tom Perez who went out of his way to beat Jeff Flake on his retirement. This is he same Jeff Flake who committed political suicide by going after and breaking down the mighty Trump piece by piece on the senate floor today. This is the guy who is on your side when it comes to trying to make sure this is a one term president.

But no, Tom Perez decided to not follow logic but instead to follow the president's lead and pile on Flake. Forget if he believes that Flake is right or wrong, if there was ever a day to praise Flake, it was today.

But god forbid these idiot Democrats get out of their own way

Monday, October 23, 2017

Take on Huck’s math

Big Huck made a big announcement today that the average American would see a $4000 increase on average under Trump's new tax law. She implied that each family would be getting a check but since 80% of the cuts would come from the top, it basically means that most people will see no increase at all.

As half the world pointed out, that isn't exactly how statistics work. If Trump gets a Ten Million Dollar tax cut and 24,999 get no tax cut, the total tax cut would be $10,000,000 which divided by the 25,000 people would be $4000. This is great news for those 25,000 people, right? Time to all put that $4k in our kid's 529 funds or put more into our 401Ks or more likely buy four new IPhone X's. I hope they take TrumpCash over at Apple.

Oh America is already so great, this is just going to make it greater

Sunday, October 22, 2017

Take on the 46%

Trump tweeted today that 46% of people believe major national news organizations fabricate stories about him which only tells me that 46% of the people in this country have lost all credibility. This is a country who needs their media to make sure our governmental branches are doing what they should be and keeping tabs on them, yet or president has worked to destroy them and our citizens seem to buy it. Trump has single handedly destroyed their credibility not because of falsehoods they've reported but because his followers are absolute sheep
Hey Donald, they don't need to make up stories about you, you create them yourselves with your gigantic ego, your lack of compassion, your inability to tell the truth, your complete drain of good will and your adolescent moral compass

You suck, your supporters are brainwashed lambs and our country and fellow citizens have never disappointed me more than this last year.

Saturday, October 21, 2017

Take on Scrotum Face vs The Spin Zone

Tucker Carlson spent a week lambasting Hollywood for covering up for Hurricane Harvey Weinstein. This is a solid point if kept in this context but an odd one to make for a guy who draws his paycheck from one Rupert Murdock. This is the same Murdock who signed Big Bill O'Reilly to a huge new contract despite 5 sexual harassment cases having been paid out to be kept quiet. I'm not where the spin stops but it seems to be rolling around Tucker's five hole right now and Big Bill is about to take an unwanted pass.

But keep on nailing Scrotum Face Weinstein, every liberal I know hopes the guy fries while very conservative I know hopes O'Reilly rises from the deaf to take pack his throne