Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Oggled and Toggled



My buddy asked the question earlier today, 'is Facebook is really just an acceptable method of spying' to which I answered a resounding "yes, hot chicks need to be oggled"


But really you wonder though what brings people to put all sorts of slutty pictures of themselves on Facebook except an inherent need to act on their voyeuristic instincts. You can find so many pictures of hot chicks (and I’m sure tons of hot dudes too) who have posted all sorts of slutty poses all over the place.

Although I believe you have every right to scope through these pictures, I do have a new appreciation for the position hot chicks are in when they get oggled by nasty dudes

I remember about two years ago I decided to hit the NYSC in Chelsea deciding this was a great idea since it was close to the place I was going to have dinner at that night. 
The even starts innocent enough.. I walk in, hit the treadmill for 4 miles, do a couple of weights and maybe 40 sit-ups and get ready to get out of there.

I walk into the locker room to shower and change and realize immediately that all the eyes in the place turn on the fresh meat that just walked in.

I also realize that it is like a fucking sauna in this entire bathroom, I'm sweating buckets. It's like they have left every shower running on extra hot and closed all the doors. The entire place feels like a greenhouse but that doesn't stop dudes are conversing and laughing.   I'm pretty sure I heard a couple of towels snap.

I find a quiet corner, take my sweaty clothes off quickly and walk over to the showers. With every step I take I feel more eyes staring down at me, as if I’m walking through the jungles in Cambodia. I run over and take cover in the shower and thanking the designers of NYSC for not having put in communal showers. I wash up and peer out from behind the curtain for some clearance. When I see a break of light, I bust out but as I hurry back towards my little corner a large buff dude winks at me.

I retreat to my corner, and there I stand broken-hearted, the only thing separating me from jail-house fun is a small white towel which all of a sudden I'm not sure is all that clean. I quickly dress and basically run out of the locker room.

Why you ask would I go to the Chelsea NYSC and not expect to get a little harassed? Because I've done this to tons of women in my life and I deserve no better

2 comments:

warren2600 said...

I hope you washed off all of the shame.

Cathy said...

david! i used to talk about lockerroom/steamroom cruising all the time! go into the steamroom and you will get molested for real. a friend of mine was in between jobs so he had a month off. every afternoon he went to nysc steamroom for some anonymous sex. he said there'd be 4 guys in there hooking up and one crisco power bottom would keep watch at the door to make sure no gym maintenance people were coming. that's why there's a sign saying "no inappropriate behavior in the steamroom". no one listens to it. if you go into the steamroom and get raped, you asked for it. there are sooo many rants about this on craigslist rants 'n raves. especially if you click on NYC or SF. i love steamroom cruising stories.