Taking on the Subway Musical Chairs

Anybody who takes the subway knows that getting a seat when you commute into the city is virtually impossible unless you are lucky/unlucky enough to live out in the middle of bumblefuck Queens or Brooklyn. By the time the trains roll into stations West of Fort Hamilton Parkway there is a zero percent chance for a comfortable seat and a 100% chance you will be standing with some giant Russian's armpit pressed into your face.
But as any veteran subway rider will tell you, there are some tricks so you at least give yourself some room or maybe a chance of a seat throughout the ride.
Friends who take the L train will tell you that if you are taking it to 8th Avenue it is best to walk towards the front as the exits for the first few stops are towards the rear which means most people will pile into those cars. People on the A train know that you are better off at the back since you'll get more people crowding the front looking to get off at 175th street. It may mean you have to walk a bit further when getting off but you won't be covered with Ivan's BO.
I take the D train our of Brooklyn and one of the best methods is to stay in the center cars. You'll be crowded through Manhattan but by the time you get to Grand Street there will be a giant exodus. The trick here is to get onto a center train and plant yourself right in front of the oldest Chinese woman on the train because there is a 100% chance she's getting off there which means that with a quick sleight-of-hand (or of ass) you will be cruising all the way to midtown.

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