Saturday, October 25, 2014

Take on the random Asian

I probably know more Asians than most people, went to a high school
that was 55% Asian, have seen both Depeche Mode and Erasure in
concert, Have been to Asia more often than just about anybody I know
and I have a long history of dating Asian chicks but even with all
that assumed knowledge, you'd think I wouldn't catch myself in
completely embarrassing situations.

I ran into some Asian guy who went to college with a great Asian
friend of mine about twenty years ago. He immediately recognized me
but even after he mentioned twenty people we knew in common, I
couldn't really place him although I played it off fairly well. It
wasn't till he said his name, Tommy Kim* (name changed to protect the
innocent), that I sort of remembered him. I didn't look like a total
dipshit but when he reminded me that ,coincidentally, I also knew his
wife, Susan Kim* (name changed to protect the innocent), who I went to
high school with, I knew he thought that there was no way I remembered
her.

Anyway, fast forward an hour and some Asian chick walks up to me and
says "you look familiar". She looks as familiar to me as any random
Asian chick would and for a second I think that maybe I've hit that
spot in my life where I can't tell anybody apart but not wanting to
admit to it, I say "yes, Susan Kim* we went to high-school together,
you are married to Tommy Kim". She looks at me and says, "I'm not
Tommy* Kim's wife Susan* Kim, I'm Laurie Kim*, married to Tony
Kim*(name changed to protect the innocent Asian)

I ducking knew I didn't know her but because she said she knew me, I
assumed that it must be Susan Kim.

Now I am sure Tommy Kim is going to tell my buddy that his high-school
boy is a racist cracker who can't tell Asians apart.



Sent from my iPhone

3 comments:

Mr. R. Lee said...

During this past baseball season at Dodger Stadium, Dennis Haysbert was shown on the big diamond vision screen.

I said aloud, "Hey, Denzel Washington!" mainly because I experienced a massive brain fart and really thought that was Denzel.

There was a black guy in front of me a few seat away, and he immediately turned around, gave me a contemptuous look, and said disgustedly, "Denzel Washington?!"

I caught my mistake at once and said, "No, Dennis Haysbert! Dennis Haysbert!"

But it was too late. The black guy had turned around and wouldn't even acknowledge me or say anything at all. I was branded as a racist who thought all black people looked alike.

That black guy was a jerk. ����

Zed said...

I knew a Susan Kim once. She looked nothing like the two other Asian chicks I dated with the same last name (not related).

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