Friday, January 13, 2012

Take on the Righetti Competition Wreckage Service and relationship wrecking company business model

10 years ago before I was a happily married father of one, when I was 240 pounds, had not yet won the D-Cup and still believed that the world revolved around Erasure, Asian Women and Sushi, I toyed with a number of business ideas.
 
First came DirtyDVD.com..   Remember when the DVD first came out, one of the main selling features were the multiple camera angles you could watch a scene from and I figured that there was no better way to utilize this new video recording device than for dirty DVD's.  First you'd watch a wide-screen shot, then a close up of the chick, another of the action and finally you'd go to the long shot to see the entire scene come to a crescendo.    Little did I know that XNXX, RedTube, Tube8, YouPorn would come along and basically make dirty movies a thing of the past
 
Then came RighettiGear.com.    TShirts with funny statements on it, the first problem was that except for four or five quirky statements, we didn't have much else...  For New Years I hand-wrote 'if drinking made your winkie shrink, would you quit?" on a tshirt in a sharpy.. that was the extent of it and then came 6dollarShirts.com which were funnier.
 
Well finally we had the idea for the Righetti Relationship wrecker..  I'm not really sure how this would make us any money but then again DirtyDVD's and RigehttiGear were about as succesful as pissing into the wind.
 
anyway this was the business model
 
Righetti Competition Wreckage Service and relationship wrecking company
     when you need protection from yourself and later protection from me.
 
a relationship wrecking company 
Cliffside Park, NJ 07010
hours: Sunday mornings from 8:30am till 11:00am
President: Russel Jones

FOR THE RIGHETTI EXPERIENCE
 
FAQ:

  • What do I get? fat slob to come with you when your meeting some slutty chick with a long term boyfriend
  • Why do I need him? to keep the L.T.B. occupied
  • What does it do for you?: the fat slob will immediately start drinking with the long term boyfriend bringing him to an immediate drunken slob
  • What happens now?  a drunk righetti will start becoming competitive and challenge the LTB to a whose got the bigger unit contest, leaving a sight no-one will want to remember
  • Can this backfire?  have you ever seen a naked Righetti?
  • I still don't get it: the long term boyfriend will be too busy in a pissing competition with our slob to pay any attention to his girlfriend, you on the other hand will be sober .
  • What does it cost?: only the price of the drinks
  • What is the Bump Guarantee?  a drunk righetti
  • What happens if all goes well? You get yours
  • What happens if I go to the men's room?  Righetti gets yours
  • What do I do then?  start drinking
  • Does this technique ever fail?  Depends how you identify failure, failure for you maybe, failure for our slob doubtful.
  • How do I dress?  better then the L.T.B. but not good enough that you mind getting puked on
  • Do You have examples of this fool proof plan working?  do you have proof it doesn't?
  • What happens if the girl is fat and slobby?  Righetti gets his
  • What happens if the girl is fat, slobby and ultra slutty?  You and Righetti might both get his
  • What happens if she winds up getting drunk instead of the LTB?  once again Righetti gets his, yours and the LTB's
  • Do you offer services for a girl looking to hook up with a guy with a LTG (long term girlfriend)?  not even a challenge, b/c a drunk girl (ltg or not) is a done chick
 

1 comment:

Unknown said...

I am stunned this came from the same man that brought us photos of shoes in a bathroom stall.