Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Europeans

"Live and direct and you know I like doin' it
They called me Biggy Balls but now call me the Big U-IN-IT
I aint a Korean
I'm the dirty European,
My balls so big if you blow me you won't be seein' it"

we know these Euros are nasty since they wear the same clothes all the time. You can meet the same guy and he'll be wearing the shirt he wore yesterday, will wear tomorrow and maybe even Thursday. I gotta imagine they shower but if you will put on the same shirt then what the hell is the point???

They again the average US citizen uses 3 times the fossil fuels a dutchman uses so maybe what they save in coal they also save in washing soap??

But what gets me is that when you go to the WC (this is a fancy word for toilet which in turn is a fancy word for bathroom) they have a few things that make no sense to a person who does care about personal hygiene.

***now by no means are any of these observations even comparable to the hole-in-the-floor I have used in both the Middle East or in China****

- in a European Toilet there is this little shelf in the toilet instead of a straight drop into the water like a US toilet. I am sure they invented this to avoid the splash back but what it really does is just give you a way to get a good look at your own dump. It also forces it to smell like all hell. Why the Dutch want to have their poop left for them to inspect is completely beyond me.

- the European's will always have a hand washing sink but almost always this is located outside the actual shitter room. I figure it's so designed to make sure that people are really washing their hands which I do actually appreciate. BUT

- The European sink will only have a cold water faucet. First of all you cannot burn off bacteria when the water is 33 degrees especially when you can't possibly keep your hands underneath it for more than 5 straight seconds.

- the Europeans are NOT into softness of their toilet Paper. It's like wiping your ass with sand-paper. And you wonder why these guys all have zits on their asses.

- The size of a European WC is similar to the size of a broom closet. I can't imagine how many poor people have passed out from the CO2 gasses collected
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

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