Take on Judgment Day

I'm not sure what the more obvious sign of the apocalypse is: the end of the day prognostication posters or the fact Sarah Palin says she has the fire in her belly to run for president

Anyway you cut it; I'm feeling a bit weird today knowing that the end of the world could be less than 24 hours away and I haven't ever played golf at Augusta, haven't ever been to the Sistine Chapel and have never seen Doctor Zhivago.   I'm also a bit annoyed that I paid off all my credit card bills, never learned how to Tango and that there hasn't ever been a verifiable topless picture of Jennifer Aniston. 

Now although I'm not happy myself I feel especially badly for my Hasidic friend who can't watch TV during the Sabbath so he won't know if the apocalypse has come for him there won't be any sign, poor guy will be kept in the dark all day until finally he'll be in the dark for the rest of eternity..

Obviously as any sane person I'm skeptical of any 'end-of-the-earth' fear-tactics BUT I have been looking in the news for signs that the end of the world is near and maybe this 7000 years after the great Noah Flood thing has some legs..  Just look at these signs

·         It has been raining for about a week straight

·         I saw two cats hanging out together in my back-yard this morning; it looked like they were planning something big.

·         80% of the dudes I questioned agreed that Serena Williams was a total piece of ass.

·         The original Judgment Day Star Arnold Schwarzenegger has been plastered over every tabloid paper.

·         OBL had a bigger porn collection than your average Irish born, sex craved rugby player

·         The US finally put their foot down on the pre 1967 borders

·         Katie Couric signs off for good of the CBS Evening News  and nobody noticed

·         Donald Trump was taken seriously as a presidential candidate

·         Jason Giambi belted three home-runs last night

·         I got a great fare on a flight to Korea for June..which apparently I won't be able to use

·         Oprah's last show is conveniently scheduled for the 25^th

·         Macho Man Randy Savage death

·         Oklahoma City making an NBA title run

·         I got a good locker at the NYSC two days in a row on the top row right by the showers

·         Mariano Rivera blows two straight saves against the Orioles

·         A seemingly hetro-sexual man dumps Bar Refaeli