Take on Krysten Sinema

Kyrsten Sinema wants to be seen as an enigma, nobody knowing quite how she will vote. She's a poor man's Joe Manchin who seems to have way more power than any one random Senator should ever have
But what bothers me is that she dresses like she shops exclusively at Forever 21. She showed up in DC dressed lined she was going to the junior prom with a 24 year old dude with a face tattoo who drives an old Camaro.

Take on the Bruce Arians sudden retirement


Tom Brady is both the GOAT and probably one of the most insufferable humans to be around joining Michael Jordan and Djokovic for those hints in their respective sports. Bruce Arians with a tailor made team to win another championship with Brady at the helm couldn't see himself lasting another day in that building trying to deal with that ego and decided instead to turn the reigns over instead of sucking in Brady's taint for another minute

Can't blame the man, really.

Take on the missing call logs.

So in the midst of the insurrection, we are lead to believe that our president didn't so much as pick up the phone to see what Melania was going to do for dinner that night?? The president who couldn't be torn away from his phone, just put it down for for nearly 8 hours and hung out?
This is Nixonian in its bravado, it's so brazen that it doesn't seem real.
This January 6th committee has to start moving because we know that come November a new majority will shut the entire thing now.

Take on the Will Smith Chris Rock Faux fight

All the talk today was about Big Willy Style slapping Chris Rock as people take sides on who was wrong and who was more wrong.   We get that this is a big deal as it put a black eye (see what we did there) on the Oscar's but honestly if you believe this wasn't totally staged, I have a bridge to sell you.    It's all too convenient to have Smith sitting front row, too convenient for Rock to crack a lame joke about his wife and too convenient for this all to go down when it would draw the most media attention and get people to tune in.  

Will Smith didn't seem to take offense to the fact his wife has been swapping bodily fluids with that personal trainer of whatever she admitted to a while ago, I doubt he got that upset about a lame joke from an over the bill comedian at a lame award show 

And Chris Rock is way to smart to not get prime coverage out of this. 

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Take on Chubby Checker

Retirement looks great on m at people. Without the stress or having to get up everyday to work, they can live the last few years in some kind of well deserved bliss especially if they've saved enough money to live out their golden years

Trump on the other hand just looks like he has put on 40 pounds which for a guy who was already 280 on a good day, isn't a good sign. If he keeps eating like he is, he'll balloon up to 350

Take on the corrupt GOP

It seems that every time you look around. Another GOP politician is getting indicted for some crime. Most of them are corruption based and they always sort of go quietly into the night which you know would not be the case of the shoes we're on the other foot
I'm sure this Jeff Fortenberry will make sure he pays his debt to society and doesn't just look for a way to skate.

Take on Ginnje

Every segment on Tucker or Hannity for like two years revolves around Her Emails. They can't get out of their own way when it comes to Hunter, and he entire place goes crazy when Obama's name is uttered yet the GOP has been conspicuously quiet about Ginny's texts with Mark Meadows. Of course this is no surprise and Clarence taking a sabbatical to avoid the scrutiny makes sense now.

But what gets me about Ginni is mostly that she always looks like she just barfed up in the back of a the parking lot of the local Waffle House.

Take on Mitch the 7year Itch

Mitch McConnell has decided to vote against Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson citing that he doesn't want to elect her to a lifetime position. He hasn't been consistent there, obviously, and it does continuously imply that he's a flaming racist. But he's also a spineless piece a trash who has never shown to ever make a decision for the good of anyone other than Mitch McConnell


Oh and a Clarence Thomas should resign or fade impeachment

Take on the double sack

Dr Oz and Herschel Walker got sacked on the same day and if they are both sacked again November it will be the best early Christmas present any sensible person could hope for

Personally I blame Jerry Jones and Oprah for these two political disasters and hope to high heaven that those two spend their eternal beings together for bringing these two meatheads into our lives

Take on Kid Rock

Somehow Donald Duck found a person less qualified than himself to get foreign policy advice from. He's been asking Kid Rock how we should handle North Korea as if the white trash hillbilly even find it on a map. But this is Trump for you, he takes his advice from the other worst of the worst. I'm sure they are both ending up with syphilis.

Take on Amy Schumer

I'm not sure whose more annoying Amy or Chuck. Amy is pushing to have Zelensky make an appearance at the Oscar's because that is what the president of a country under siege by Russians should be spending his time doing. I wonder if her expectation is that he does this live so that there is a chance we hear bombs go off on the background. It's just another example Hollywood wanting to use any opportunity to pat itself on the back and I'm not standing for it.
I hope nobody watches this dreadful show

Take on the lifetime Supreme Court justice spot

When I heard that Clarence Thomas was hospitalized I had that same feeling I did when Scalia passed.   I hate to be that guy but when the only way to turn over the high court is through death, it seems like you have to sort of root for it.   There really shouldn't be lifetime appointments for any government position as there isn't any real rationale for it and I'd much prefer each presidential term would get two justices.  This would turn the Court over in 18 years which still seems long but would bring it to a living breathing part of our structure versus some antiquated lifetime achievement award with no repercussions.  It would also allow each President to know she will get two appointments which becomes part of the election narrative.  If a third one dies they get to fill in with an interim one till the end of their term and that seat becomes one of the two the next president appoints.   

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Take on the Cosmonauts

A photo of those Russian cosmonauts showing up at the space station in Ukrainian flag colored uniforms was ballsy, mostly because we know Emperor Putin has a habit of making sure people who cross him end up standing in front of an open window. Congrats on having a sack. Sadly they may never make it back to earth

Take on the NFL

The NFL did what the NFL does and they don't have a care in the world what it will be perceived as. The Browns traded every pick they have in the next decade to get the right to give Deshaun Watson one the richest contract in league history. He's obviously an immense talent but the fact that a guy with nearly two dozen sexual misconduct allegations still pending can walk into an NFL room and demand that kind of money tell you all you need to know.

A guy beta on his team with a league partner gamboling site and he's suspended a year, Kaep kneels and he's blackballed for life.

Then again when you think of the QB's the Browns have had since their triumphant return to the NFL you may want to keep your morals in check for a while

By my count
Brandon Weeden
Johnny Manziel,
Brian Hoyer,
RG3,
Austin Davis,
Josh McCown,
DeShone Kizer,
Kevin Hogan,
Cody Kessler,
Tyrod Taylor,
Baker Mayfield

Take on Davante

Aaron Rodgers is such a miserable prick that Davante Adams turned down the same contract offer from the Raiders to trade his QB from ARod to DCarr. We all know Rodgers is a wet blanket who has way to big a platform for his nonsensical MAGA rants and medical advice but never though the NFL players would revolt but glad they finally stepped up and did something

Now time to get Kaep back in the league

Take on Bill Barr.

I'm not sure who the hell has any interest in what Bill Barr has to say but somehow his book is a #1 seller. I can't think of a book I'd have less interesting in wanting to read, an author I'd have less interest in wanting to support and a book I'd have less interest in wanting to display in my bookcase. He's a fat weasel who sold out our country and his latest image rebuilding tour should be going as well as Fat Chris Christie's did.

Take on the Daylight Savings Time bill

We can't seem to agree on anything in this country but it was refreshing to see the Senate unanimously vote to make Daylight Savings Time permanent. It's not something we will see until 2023 assuming it passes the House and is signed by Biden meaning we have another winter of misery ahead

I do feel badly for the local papers and newscasts who won't be able to roll out their lame canned stories twice a year about sprinting forward and falling backwards

Take on Ginni Thomas

If Elena Kalgan's husband went to a Black Panthers meeting the GOP would have her impeached yesterday. Shit, if he went to a Black Crows concert they wouldn't let her live it down but somehow Ginni Thomas hangs out at a January 6th rally and nobody says a word


She's obviously a horrid human who is married to a absolute slimeball for what he did to Anita Hill. They should throw them both out of the country

Take on the retirement

We all say that athletes should retire a year too soon rather than a year too late but it isn't true. The idea is that we don't want to see a broken down Peyton Manning or Joe Namath trying to hold onto a glimmer of hope when their body has failed them. The problem is the ones that leave too early like Barry Sander, Calvin Johnson, Sandy Koufax, Michael Jordan the 1st and 2nd times deprive us of what we assume would have been great years. Of course they leave on their terms and when they do it's completely their prerogative but as fans we yearn for more. These generation athletes hanging it up adds to their legacy but also takes away from it as we wonder how good they may have been for their careers.

Take on the MOmA

Dealing with people in customer service is a pain in the ass but we all realize they have impossibly difficult jobs dealing with a bunch of needy and demanding customers. With that said, we've all lost our cool with them at some point especially when it feels like they should try to service us the paying customer but some dude decided to take it a step further

He didn't just lose his cool but he stabbed somebody for the fact his membership at the MOMA had been revoked.

Having been to the MOMA I'd say it was a blessing and he should have thanked somebody

Take on the MNF booth


One of the biggest mistakes that the NFL's broadcast partners constantly make is assuming the audience cares who is doing the game. Both Joe Buck and Troy Aikman were lured away from Fox to do Monday Night Football for ESPN and given extremely lucrative contracts. I'm not holding this against Buck or Aikman as they should get every Penny they can but I do think that there are very few broadcasters who can transcend their program…that entire list starts and stops with Howard Cosell .

I cannot tell you the last time I tuned into a game because Joe Buck was doing it. There is a connection that broadcasters have with a local audience, baseball specifically but a national NFL game has appeal based on the matchup or what people have on the line, not Tony Romo or Brent Musburger. The Manning cast is different because that is not about the game and truth be told it only fractures the audience from the traditional broadcast which with Buck and Aikman on board at their salaries is an even odder concept

Take on the ads on baseball uniforms

Baseball players are about to look like nascar drivers with all the advertisements in their uniforms. I get they are looking to monetize every revenue stream but to have the Yankee pinstripes bastardized with an ad for WB Mason or something is just sacrilege. I'm sure we will only get more ads including ones on the oversized bases, oversized bats and oversized juiced arms.

Take on Stephen Miller

Stephen Miller definitely doesn't want the January 6th commission to get their hands on his phone records because it will likely reveal some inconvenient phone calls he was a part of on that fateful day. But the reason he really doesn't want to have those records made public is that as a guy who serve as a senior White House aid, he still shares a plan with his parents.

Then again can't fault a guy for getting a good deal

Take on Stephen Miller

Stephen Miller definitely doesn't want the January 6th commission to get their hands on his phone records because it will likely reveal some inconvenient phone calls he was a part of on that fateful day. But the reason he really doesn't want to have those records made public is that as a guy who serve as a senior White House aid, he still shares a plan with his parents.

Then again can't fault a guy for getting a good deal

Take on the Saudi ghost

With friends like this who needs enemies. Biden made calls to MBS and MBZ this week and both sent him to voicemail. This obviously ain't good and shows a huge lack of respect for Biden when the US needs them most. We get that they may not want to pump more oil now, but considering what has happened to Ukrainian and nobody wanting a world war, an economic sanctions might be the cleanest way our but in order to make those work we need cooperation.
So F you MBS and MBZ or what we your name is. Next time you call. I hope you get a busy signal

Take on Big Bill Barr

Bill Barr has been criminally compromised for years. How he was ever confirmed for the top law enforcement job is beyond me as he was so obviously unqualified and fully compromised when he took it. And nothing speaks to that more than his unwavering support of Trump even after he ripped him in his new book and Trump called him a fat toad.
So excuse flame for not giving a crap about what this treasonous slob has to say

Take on baseball

Baseball is trying to fix their game with a bunch of lame measures over the past few years. First they went to this lame idea of putting a runner at second base to start an extra inning game, then they went to the 7 inning double header and now they want to lose the shift.

I get that baseball is boring as hell and nobody on their right mind would actually watch 9 innings of this but there have to be better ways to fix it than to basically turn it into a beer league.

You know they want to increase the sizes of the bases mainly so that when a dude spends $800 to take his family of four and sits in the upper deck, he can say he saw the base…and it will be that much more convenient when they start selling advertisements on top of the bags.

All of it sucks, learn to hit the other way to avoid the shift, make a pitcher nervous by crowding the plate, play the game the right way with hit and runs and sacrifices.

Don't even get me started on that runner on second base crap. It's a matter of time that they decide to play only five innings and then let them do a home run derby to decide the winner.

Take on the mega yachts.

As the West tries to punish Putin and his cronies, we have seen a host of sanctions and financial maneuvers designed to inflict the maximum amount of pain. The one that has gotten the most press though are the worldwide impoundments of those mega yachts owned by the oligarchs. I'm all for making them suffer but wonder what the legal rationale is and are they doing it with cara, houses etc also? We know these guys aren't exactly mother teresa but unless they stole those yachts, how are we forcefully taking them. I'm not exactly crying, so don't care but.

Take on the Trump and John Daly connection.

John Daly got a call from Trump and answers it on his speaker phone once again showing what a gigantic ass they both are. The weird thing with Trump is that it's impossible to know how much classified information he let out on impromptu calls like this while president. The one good thing is that Daly was likely so blitzed, he didn't hear a word.

Take on Lindsey

I hate everything about Lindsey Graham but he's right to call for somebody to take out Putin as the re isn't any way this conflict ends without a lot more bloodshed as long as he's in charge. Of course Linsey said this and only had a long enough time to say so between slurps of Trump's dingy who he idolized in one of the sickest ways ever.

Take on the drama queens

The sight most will remember from the State of the Union would be two white trash representatives showing everybody how much of a low life they both are. We knew this of course but the two acted like a bunch of jackasses as if they were yelling at the server of an Applebees because they didn't get a pickle with their sandwich.
This is who the world sees when they think of our country, total and utter trash

Take on the state of the union

We watched the State of the Union which was high on American pride and bipartisanship and low on lame theatrics.

A few comments

Biden has aged..all lot in the last fee weeks. He's always been old but he does sort of have that "I forgot where I left my teeth" look going

- Kamala's brown suit was slamming

-Pelosi looks like Kermit the Frog on Botox

- Mitch McCarthy was checking his fantasy basketball stats

- Joe Manchin is a fat sellout

- Boebert is a filthy slob who really needs to have her husband prosecuted for showing his pooh bear to a bunch of teenage girls

- MTG always looks like a T-Rex, her arms are just too short for her body

- fatherhood looks good on Mayor Pete

- Schmuck Schumer is such a toad

- Breyer looked like a clown with his faux surprises in getting called out look



Anyway, glad we have a president who gave a normal SOTU without embarrassing the hell out of himself