Last week when I flew last minute to Europe for a funeral, I had one of those moments. I walk upto the security line, dutifully taking off my shoes, removing my laptop and emptying my pockets (I never take out my toiletries) and walk to the scanning machine. Anybody who travels at all knows about these full scanning machines they are using now which are basically everything those XRay glasses they offered in the back of comics were supposed to be. As a side note those glasses never worked and only exposed you for the horny creep you were since they gave you no ability to actually see through Peggy Toledo's tshirt
Well when I went to the airport, I got shuffled to the full scanning machine as opposed to the normal metal-detector (probably for my refusal to take out my toothpaste). I check my pockets and head over and of course the machine starts beeping like I just smuggled a bunch of mexican coke in my five-hole.
I check my pockets and feel nothing metallic but the guy points to my left pocket. I pat it and tell him there is nothing in there but he makes me empty it anyway. Obviously those machines work because inside I pull out a pair of girls panties which should have been an incredibly proud moment for any dude.... But sadly this wasn't one of those time because the pair I pulled out had Dora the Explorer printed on them
Sent from my iPhone
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