I wake up each morning with a pain in my ankle and a balky knee. Recently a bloody foot has entered the story. It's not devastating but whenever you take your white sock off and proceed to stain the floor, you realize you will never be a foot model. I'm hoping to the good lord that this won't sting with that new body wash.
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The Kennedy center has to go back to its original name and something as lame as naming rights, has never made me happier. I can't tell you that this is important but I feel like any defeat is a good thing a this point. Maybe we can rename MetLife next
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Trump's big performers for his party are dropping like flies. I mean, we aren't talking A listers to star off with but to see the lineup now be Vanilla Ice and Bret Michaels has to be disappointing to anybody. I'm actually shocked Kid Rock isn't signed up yet.
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I just can't with this administration. It's been 5 1/2 years of Trump in office and everything he ever campaigned against is now something he does blatantly and without remorse. He wanted to drain the swamp, he knocked Hunter Biden for using his family connections to get lucrative contracts, he claimed the DOJ was weaponized, he said no to endless middle eastern wars, he claimed to be against regime change, he claimed to never be sleepy. This entire 14 year stretch from when he descended from the escalator till he eventually is forced out, will go down as the darkest days of the 250 years of the presidency.
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I walked into the local Target yesterday and thought I'd accidentally walked into a Buffalo Bills fan store in upstate New York. My neighborhood Target now has a full section of dildos and vibrators which I assume comes after some market research tells them that the local housewives are in need but in still it sure one of them wants to be caught dead with a 12 inch dong in her grocery basket.
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I honestly don't understand how the US economy hasn't suffered more under Trump. We know the tariffs, the trade was, the lack of real oversight etc should give people pause but somehow we keep humming along. But the lack of tourism has to start hitting the economic numbers. You see less tourist in NYC, I was in Vegas a few months ago and it felt dead. I had friends who were near the Canadian border on a boat and they said the marinas were empty. It can't go on like this and. It hit our bottom line.
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This Knicks postseason run has been amazing and has brought such life back to a once proud organization. It's a team with good chemistry likable players and great tenacity. It also is a team whose head coach wears a black quarter zip with pants that aren't the same tint of black. I don't know what it is but my OCD brain cannot look at this without constantly thinking that he just dress in the dark and that's coming from somebody who is one of the worst dressed humans you've ever met.
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I don't believe there is a legitimate reason that Yankee Candle exists. How many people are walking into a mall on a rainy Saturday to buy a pine tree scented candle? There just be something else going on in that place, like they must be selling hallucinogenics or some kind of weird herbal life extenders because they can't survive on $11.99 purchases
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Nothing irks me more than the world telling us we need to use mass transit and then mass transit using the opportunity to rip you off. I get that fuel prices are higher and it's something we should acknowledge but when CoachLine decides to add a $2 fuel surcharge it feels like a blatant ripoff. The bus ride just increased by about 25% and I'm sure this isn't the end.
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When you commute into NYC five days a week, there are days that suck more than others. The lines at Port Authority this week have felt like you are standing online for Knicks tickets expect for being surrounded by excited basketball fans, you are surrounded by people who look like they hope the his runs off of the road. It's like slowly sucking every last bit of life out of you.
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The corruption is so blatant that it's hard to get worked up because nobody seems to be hiding anything anymore. When Trump got his lifelong get-out-of-jail card from his own agency, we knew it was over. We no longer have a functioning government, we no longer stand for anything virtuous, we no longer are a country to be envied. We are nothing more than the kind of third world deeply corrupt dictatorships we claim to fight against.
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It's 100 degrees outside, the Knicks are in the Eastern Conference finals and nobody is bothering me. This is the time I go to my fridge and grab a beer. I typically do IPA's but on a hot summer day I don't mind something lighter. My fridge is usually stocked but today I'm digging in the back and pull out a Bud Heavy which is the only thing I have that isn't something brutal like a Yuengling. I have had three Bud Heavies in the last thirty years and I'm immediately reminded of why. This thing tastes like that Yuengling filtered through my gym socks. It's an absolutely flavorless bottle of Clydesdale piss.
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The corruption from Trump is so blatant that we've now just become immune to any feelings about it. I can't believe he has done it but over the last decade he has made us forget our values and morals and now whenever he does something we just collectively shrug. It's like the entire country has just given up as it all feels completely preordained and predictable.
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The White House is trumpeting an agreement they say the Chinese have made that would have US farmers selling $17 million of agricultural products annually. That sounds like an incredible number until you realize we routinely sold them over $20billion before Trump started playing chicken. He flew half way across the globe to come back with a worse deal than we had before he came into office and still the sycophantic media will praise him for tying his shoes.
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Has anybody seen the Jaxson Dart billboards for some no name insurance company ? I can't believe those things, they look like somebody took a phone with their iPhone of him mid blink and they are posted up and down the turnpike. It must cost them a fortune to have him as a sponsor and the billboard space can't be cheap, yet they have some lame logo, some stupid phrase and then cheap out on the photo. Hey random insurance company, let me help you burn $2M next time
Why would a man ever walk out of the house for something longer than to take the garbage out wearing shoes without socks? Not only is it a completely ridiculous look, there is no way this dude isn't coming home with his feet reeking to high heavens. It is the look that screams, not only am I most certainly a flaccid ape, you won't be able to sit in the same room with me after I take these off. A man's feet should never be sock-less in a close toed shoe, I will take no further questions.
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Going on vacation with a bunch of fellow retirees from Columbus and then walking around the city with a stupid yellow hat has to be the equivalent of volunteering to be water boarded. I have worked in the city for almost 30 years and I'm still shocked by how these tourney are willing to be dressed up like a bunch of walking match sticks for like $100 a pop. These are adults and the fact they have to be color coordinated so one doesn't accidentally wander off into Central Park make me sad for the state of humanity
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For the life of me I can't figure out why people take Saran Wrap and invade their luggage. Maybe it proves that somebody hasn't gone through your bag and looked at your dirty underwear on a return flight. Maybe they use it to keep your bag from getting dirty or maybe it's just a giant condom.
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Nobody has to tell Americans that the economy isn't good. Nobody cares that the stock market is booming when you spend $70 to fill up your tank and $250 doesn't get you a grocery cart full of food. The entire world seems upside down if the only thing we convince ourselves is good is the fact that dollar pizza is only $1.50
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The rotting corpse is getting bored in Iran which men's he either finds a new shiny toy or he decides to blow up Castle Grayskull. It sounds more and more ore like we will have boots on the ground in Tehran which sounds like the kind of half baked plan that had us in Iraq for a decade. Glad we got the no forever wars president.
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