Take on the sockless man.

Why would a man ever walk out of the house for something longer than to take the garbage out wearing shoes without socks? Not only is it a completely ridiculous look, there is no way this dude isn't coming home with his feet reeking to high heavens. It is the look that screams, not only am I most certainly a flaccid ape, you won't be able to sit in the same room with me after I take these off. A man's feet should never be sock-less in a close toed shoe, I will take no further questions.

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Take on the group tour.

Going on vacation with a bunch of fellow retirees from Columbus and then walking around the city with a stupid yellow hat has to be the equivalent of volunteering to be water boarded. I have worked in the city for almost 30 years and I'm still shocked by how these tourney are willing to be dressed up like a bunch of walking match sticks for like $100 a pop. These are adults and the fact they have to be color coordinated so one doesn't accidentally wander off into Central Park make me sad for the state of humanity

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Take on the luggage condom

For the life of me I can't figure out why people take Saran Wrap and invade their luggage. Maybe it proves that somebody hasn't gone through your bag and looked at your dirty underwear on a return flight. Maybe they use it to keep your bag from getting dirty or maybe it's just a giant condom.

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Take on the economy

Nobody has to tell Americans that the economy isn't good. Nobody cares that the stock market is booming when you spend $70 to fill up your tank and $250 doesn't get you a grocery cart full of food. The entire world seems upside down if the only thing we convince ourselves is good is the fact that dollar pizza is only $1.50

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Take on Iran

The rotting corpse is getting bored in Iran which men's he either finds a new shiny toy or he decides to blow up Castle Grayskull. It sounds more and more ore like we will have boots on the ground in Tehran which sounds like the kind of half baked plan that had us in Iraq for a decade. Glad we got the no forever wars president.

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take on the cruise from Hell

I haven't followed this that closely but letting anybody off of that cruise ship to mingle with masses seems like a terrible idea. I am not saying they should be stranded at sea but this seems like it's ripe for a true Lost show where they go to some remote island and live a Lord of the Flies show that CNN broadcast on TV. We'd all be glued to the sets and everybody would forget about the $5 gas, asymmetrical economy and miserable president.

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Take on shooing carry etiquette

Nothing shows rich upper middle class elitism than the way they treat the guys who have to collect rh shopping carts in the parking lot. Look around and these self centered pricks will leave carts in the middle of the parking lot, in the roads throughout that parking lot, upon the grass etc. They all believe that bribing that cart back 19 feet to the font of the store is below them. This is the downfall of humanity .

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The on the hantavirus

We aren't ready for another pandemic and I'm quite sure we wouldn't survive as a country. The only thing I'm happy about is that this Hantavirus isn't some respiratory thing like Covid where you were fearful if somebody so much sneeze in your direction. I'm not sure how serious to take this but I am certainly not going on a cruise

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Take on the never ending story

Is there a more boring national story than this Vrabel/Russini thing. I get that the are both scummy people and because they are national figures it's a pastor but this affair seems to have way longer lifeline. I'm honestly not sure why this is even a story at all anymore.

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Take on the Met Gala

I swear that after 50 years on this fine earth, I still have no idea what the Met Gala is. I mean I know what it's about and that a bunch of celebrities dress up like some fancy Halloween but I don't know what the actual goal is. I used do think it was to support the Mets which seems like a worthwhile cause and is be fine with Beyoncé dressing like a cat for the cause

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Take on the ballroom

We were told it wasn't going to touch the East Wing, we were told it would be gullly paid for by donations and we were told it would be tastefully done and because it's Trump none of that happened. We know the donations were a payoff. We knew saving the East Wing was a lie and we knew that this thing would be a hideous eyesore. And we have always been sure that this thing will be completely wire tapped by the Chinese, Russians, Israelis, Venezuelans and everybody else.

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Take on the end of Spirit

I've heard people debate the demise of Spirit from the fuel prices to the competitive nature of the industry to an unsaid underlying recession. I think that it's always been more simple than that, people hated the experience. Flying isn't glamorous but when it becomes a thing where you are nickel and diming me to death, people take notice. So here's a hint, don't treat us like we are traveling on NJ transit and maybe we'd stay loyal

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Take on Rudy Giuliani's ‘Critical Condition’

Rudy is in critical condition and there is nobody who seems to care at all. Most of what I've heard so far said "he sucks but I wish you were telling this story about somebody else." I'm guessing he makes it out and continues to be a bit of a drunken uncle at GOP events. His fall from grace is epic and I'm wondering at what part in the obituary does it have him taking off his pants

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Take on Iran

Trump is going to try a new plan for Iran because giving him the ability for a do over seems totally sensible. We have gotten into a meaningless war which is killing inflation and the economy not to mention the impact on thousands of Iranians. This is the world we live in now, the guy who crashes the car gets another car on our dime.

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Take on gas price

Trump may try to convince his base that we are winning in Iran but anybody who has filled up in the last month, sure doesn't seem to feel that way. It's costing me $55-$60 every time I fill up. The buses are full, the commuter trains are packed and my wallet is empty but if you complain you will be tagged as being anti American by the Trump crazies.

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Take on Zuck the Cuck

There's no bigger dying star than Meta. They have apparently lost 20 million users and I have to think that's not enough. If they counted the bots they'd be down by 500million I was one of the first to drop out of Facebook seeing it for the cesspool it was and I'm off Instagram now also seeing how mind numbingly addictive that is. Never has a human made more on people's misery than Zuckerberg and seeing his demise will be music to my ears.

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Take on the Hod This Call Button

There are some features that Apple does really well. None is better than when you get one of those codes and it lets you paste them directly into the app but this new feature when it recognizes that you are on some endless hold thing and says it will notify you when it's time to pick up. I don't know what happens when the person does pickup and I'm too sacred to try it as I'm obviously desperate enough to stay on hold for thirty minutes but I do like the idea of the tires being turned and the guy at the car dealer service center now being forced to listen to my hold music. (Which would be Master of Puppets at volume 11).

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Take on the bus terminal

I always assumed that if there was a purgatory if would look a lot like the Port Authority. Gigantic lines of people hoping to get home that night but knowing there is a mostly equal chance you are going to be sleeping there for eternity with a bunch of crack heads and dudes that smell like days old dried urine. I'm told we should get a new bus terminal sometime in the next twenty years which will be right about when I'm ready to never use public transport for work again

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Take on Lindsey

Old lady Lindsey is at it again. Getting on his knees to pray to the latest alpha male in his life. He used to be obsessed with McCain then he fell for Trump and when he fell, he fell hard. And now, like a decade later he's urging congress to pay for this idiotic ballroom because he's sure daddy will be happy

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Take on the body aches

It happened overnight, or at least that's what I need to tell myself but I went from being fairly spry and nimble to feeling like I'm Frankenstein when I get up. It's like my entire body has some weird atrophy where nothing moves or bends like it should. I'll sure yoga for Pilates or whatever would help but this feels like it ran me over like a truck.

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