Take on Trump imposing new tariffs on Mexico, Canada and China

He threatened it but I wasn't sure it was ever going to happen, but tomorrow we will see Trump impose a 25% tariff on its two largest trading partners plus an additional 19% in China. I have for months said that tariffs on China were inevitable, I could see them against hostile countries and even Mexico and Europe seemed like something he'd do. But Canada?? I cannot for my life figure out how those funny sounding northerners got caught up in this mess

But this is Trump. Screw everything up and blame Biden.

Take on the sportstalk commander in chief

The tragedy at Reagan International airport was something we haven't witnessed with a commercial flight in decades in this country. People were stunned and the country was demanding answers but our commander in chief decided this would a good time to play Monday Morning Quarterback and basically call into WFAN to speak to Benigno to question why the Jets went for two when it was 18-14 instead of kicking the extra point.

Take on the $50M condom buy.

Trump's latest (false) claim is that we were committed to declining $50 million worth of condoms to Hamas. I can't imagine why Hamas would even use $50M on condoms which has to be well over 30,000,000 rubbers which is a lot for anybody let among an enclave of about 2 million people.
Personally this might be a good money spend because condoms can limit pregnancy. Less pregnancies equals less new babies born to Hamas fighters .

Take on the (second) worst person in the world

When somebody tells you who they are, believe them. Elon Musk has spent the last few years daring us to despise him knowing we can't quit him. He's made himself less likable while he's becoming infinitely richer as we continue to buy and use his products and services and clamor at a chance to watch his rockets fly. We've known him to be a horrible human but somehow it doesn't bother us enough, very much similar to the way this country sees Trump. The truth is that for most of this county, they are a kinship.

Take on Google Maps to show Gulf of America after government updates

I thought I saw an Onion headline when I read that Google would officially change get the name to The Gulf of America. This is the kind of lame appeasement you'd expect out of some state owned North Korean enterprise not one of the most powerful companies in the world. To bow down to Trump is already so awful but to do it for something this lame is mesmerizingly dumb
I guess it's time to move to Bing.

Take on Trump's latest tariff

Trump decided unilaterally to impose a 25% tariff on Colombia which means my next Pike Place Roast is to cost me $9. I don't think that Trump has any idea what the hell he's doing but he will certainly increase inflation with these retaliatory tariffs.

Unrelated to Colombia but not to inflation, I noticed a dozen eggs is like $12 now. When does America become Great??

Take on the lab leak theory

I'm not a complete conspiracy theorist but the fact that the CIA now sees the lab leak as the most likely beginning of Covid was the most obvious thing ever. The fact the laboratory specializing in coronavirus happen to be the random city the outbreak started in, a theory that was always a bit sus. But for some reason we were afraid to acknowledge that publicity or question the Chinese on their proposed theory. Sometimes the most obvious answer is the right one.

Take on Pete Hegseth as defense secretary

Nothing is worse than getting a message at 9pm message saying Pete Hegseth was confirmed. When a vote is 50-50 and JD Vance is the deciding vote, you know it can't be good. I can't believe how miserable our county has become with these horrible nominees

Take on the party of God

You have to love the party of God. Mike Johnson was advised against subpoenaing Cassidy Hutchinson because of sexual explicit texts between her and multiple lawmakers. This is where we are, the GOP can't even hope to get to the truth of one event because it would expose the viscous truths of another.

Take on the puddle of piss

How is it that in 5000 years of human civilization, we still can't figure out m a way to not piss in the floor. I go to these conferences and it's the only time the mens room lines are longer than the ones for the women's room. But the fact you walk in and the entire place looks and smells like an open sewer is only the second most disturbing part of it. Every urinal has a small ocean or piss in front of it that forces you to stand so far back you can only be expected to add to it.
By the end of the days they may as well swing the door open and you just piss in the general direction of the pisser

Take on Trump's Gaza vision.

There was a lot that bothered me about yesterday but nothing as much as the way Trump decided to describe Gaza. The dismissive nature of the 45k lives lost, the inability to have any human sensitivity isn't new but the way he saw the entire enclave with just a developer's eye was frightening. He basically sees the rubble, the devastation, the destruction as an opportunity. Not for ever lasting peace but as a place to build a casino or resort. Evil doesn't describe him with enough vigor

Take on the Ronald McDonald show

You have to appreciate any gym which makes their entire place look like the inside of a McDonalds, either as a mind trick to make you believe you actually want to be there or as motivation for a post workout snack. I know there are more important things today including the official move into the oligarch class and seeing our norms defiled but let's focus on something positive like thinking of a BigMac when doing a leg-press.

Take o. The TikTok ban and unban

The cry came in loud and clear....nooooooooooooooo!
It was late Saturday and TikTok had gone dark which although was. Fully expected, still seemed surreal mostly because of the cryptic pro Trump outgoing message sending out the Trump signal to come and rescue it. A few hours later, Trump did and all is well and good for millions of teenagers. I can't tell you how devastating this was for five sophomores I was in a car with, each expressing the feeling as essentially losing an arm. We don't know where this will go, but with Trump seeing TikTok as a useful tool, I'm guessing he's keeping it around as long as it remains something he can manipulate.

Take on sub zero.

As I stare at the weather so to see the attic chill should be brining us some single digit temperatures which with the windchill could drop below 0 makes you sort of happy when it's only 20 degrees. We get on of these artic storms every year or two, so they aren't no shocking but I'm 100% sure we got more snow but a lot let's brutal cold when I was a kid. But yeah, climate change is a hoax

take on the NFL weekend

This weekend is traditionally the best weekend of the NFL schedule but I gotta say the games this year just don't move the needle with the exception of Ravens and Bills. I know that I'm probably going to be dead wrong but the idea of the Texans vs Chiefs, Commies vs Lions and Rams vs Eagles don't do anything for me. Will I watch, of course because it's the NFL but am I going to make sure I'm there for every snap. No chance.

Take on the non ban

Every politician whether conventional or unconventional, democrats or republican, standard or whackadoodle knows that he can't take on big tech. We know that Zuck and Bezos and Musk are groveling to Trump but we also know Trump needs them more than anything else right now. Biden's decision not enforce the TikTok ban is another show of weakness as he's scared of the repercussions.

Take on the hostage negotiations

This will go down as Biden's Iran hostage moment, with the ceasefire starting on the eve of his departure.  I know that Carter had the indignity of seeing their release after Reagan took office but this deal is the same in principle as the one Biden has been proposing for months, yet it will be Trump who takes the credit for it..as long as it's good.  

With that's said, I originally din't understanding why Trump wanted a deadline before Inauguration Day as it seemed like he'd love the chance to run it in Biden's face but the more I think I about it, it's done with some sick strategy because it will allow him to blame Biden if it goes sideways.  If one of the 100s of Palestinian prisoners ends up involved with as much as hurting a fly, you know Trump will be all down Biden's throat about it. 

Sent from my iPhone

Take on Starbucks ending its ‘open-door’ policies for the can

Starting in a few short days you will not be allowed to walk into Starbucks, drop a deuce and walk out. We know this is shocking but I find it rather pleasant as there is no way the Starbucks in NYC can keep up with the people pissing on the walls, shitting in the sinks and puking on the floor. We need a clean place to plop down and do our business and if it costs me a Pike Place Roast, I see that as a good thing

Take on the GOP's typical response to a natural disasters in a blue state.

As is typical with GOP lawmakers, when a Blue state needs help, they're looking for concessions. This is the polar opposite of when democratic lawmakers open up the coffers for tornadoes or hurricanes or whatever in red states and proves again that the GOP are a bunch of miserable hypocrites. Mike Johnson wil use the opportunity to get praise from Hannity and Glen Beck while California burns. Typical of these self righteous scum.

Take on the Steelers.



Be careful what you wish for... the Steelers are a perennial playoff team but because they can't seem to advance past the first round, their fans are calling for his head. As a fan of the Jets, a team which hasn't made the playoffs since in my teenager's lifetime, this seems beyond asinine. Bad football team, let fans help make their decisions which are based on emotion. Good football teams, build programs that are sustainable and stable. Believe me, Steeler Nation, you don't want any of this misery.

Take the Shade

Kamala Harris throwing shade at Trump with every last post she has is astonishing. We know it's a bit petty but he's such a completely self centered bag of dog piss, this is all you can expect.

Take on the Canada tariffs .

Tariffs are idiotic and nothing but a tax on the middle class and on American businesses but when Trump decided to get into it with China, you could see the (misguided) rationale. When he treated it against Mexico, it made less sense as it will destroy our own domestic automotive car manufacturers but again you could see that Trump is trying to stick it in the eye of Mexico

but Canada?? I can't understand this for a second, if you had to ask me to give you a tip 100 most likely countries to be seen as an adversary, Canada would literally be number 1000.

Take on the felon in chief

Trump will go into the office as the first convicted felon to serve as president. I'm sure these aren't the only crimes he's committed but they are the only ones he's had to face up to. I'm glad to see that SCOTUS showed a little guts here and a big hat tip to Barrett and Roberts for putting country over party.

Take on the corrupt Supreme Court

The fact that SCOTUS members have no ethics committees to answer to is just dreadful. The grift that Thomas has taken part of and the blatant conflict of interests that both he and Alito regularly display should be seen as criminal m. But this is the country we want apparently with the powerful holding nobody accountable and the middle class suffering all the way to the poor house.

The on Zuck getting rid of fact checking.

Mark Zuckerberg has always been a complete dweeb. Not only does he not have a spine, he looks like a ginger's crotch. When he announces the Meta will no longer fact check, it was obviously his attempt to publicly felate Trump. We know he already donated to the inauguration thing, we know he went down to Mar-a-Lago to gravel and now we know he's willing to sell his soul for nothing. Congrats America, our lying future president is now completely coddled by any form of media.

Take on Justin Trudeau resignation

It sounds like Trump may get his way and add Canada into the fold. In all for the natural resources, improvement in our hockey players and better yet millions of new voters who can help swing elections to the correct side.

Maybe Trump can get Canada to throw in Trudeau to give Melania as a birthday gift.

So let's pursue this idea.

Take on the final Medal of Freedom ceremony of Biden's presidency


Reading the medal of freedom recipients is a list of who's who and also a list of who??? I get the love for Hillary and even for Bono and it's kind of cool Bill Nye the science guy got one but then I see that Ralph Lauren and Anna Wintour got ones too and the entire thing feels cheapened. I'm not really it or thaw silly civilian honors socially at the end of a term and wish we could just got back o actually honoring good people who have dedicated their lives to service not a guy who made khakis cool.

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Take on the treadmill

Nothing is more miserable and makes time feel like it's standing still quite like running in a treadmill. I don't know what it is but it's easily an experience to takes an already difficult task of running and make it instantly worse. But then again, it's 1 degrees considering the windchill, so it's my only option.

Take on the US surgeon general alarm about booze

The beer industry has been getting killed lately, first the wackos decided to boycott BudLite, then I saw a report that teenagers are drinking less than. Ever and now the surgeon general is chiming in.

For years I heard that a glass of wine was good for your health or drinking in moderation wasn't detrimental but now I'm seeing the surgeon general basically wants to put a "you will die if you drink this beer" label on my IPA.

Take on the giant polar vortex dildo

We have another one of those polar vortexes coming our way this weekend and I for one am already sick of it. I saw the shelves staring to empty, the
Schools considering a snow day and the weather channels showing gigantic dildos on their screens. I think it's fine to just say bye bye and get me back to 50 degrees because a wind chill of -10 doesn't sound like any fun.

Take on the Florida PornHub ban

The entire population of Florida woke up this morning to find out they can no longer get to PornHub or any of its dozen or so sister sites. I can't feel too badly because those aholes voted for Trump and this is equivalent for us to have to live under another four years. So I'm asking, how fast can the democrats turn this into a GOP issue that they take advantage of. My guess is they will fumble this golden(shower) opportunity

Take on the Capitol building struck with lightning

The United States Capitol getting hit by lighting right before we moved into 2025 was an inauspicious event for our next few years. We know that the spineless Republicans in congress have given up trying to hold Trump accountable, actually they never have even shown any interest in doing so. But this is what we will be dealing with, all three branches of government under his fat thumb and we are all going to be so screwed.