Saturday, November 28, 2009

I have become nothing more than a rodeo clown


The TOR experience comes in a few different ways: venomously over the interwebs, lamely over dinner or sloppily after the "I Do's". But as much as I would love to go into hiding I have become such a sideshow that I feel obligated to be an idiot even if nobody cares to watch.

I often think about the movie Wedding Crashers where Vince Vaughn and one of the Wilson brothers make their annual pilgrimage to the most prestigious nuptials in the area with the hope of hooking up with single horny/desperate chicks. At some point there is some scene when some drunken fool makes an ahole out of himself and everytime I see that scene I realize that in real life I am that ahole.

What was once a drunken act of unprompted stupidity is now a badly choreographed part of every wedding reception I go to like the cake cutting or some line-dance. I feel like an actor whose show was once featured on Broadway but now is played in front of small audiences of old-people who would are waiting to die.

The saddest thing is that I fully realize I suck and am nothing more than a court jester at this point. With this being the last wedding of the season, the TOR experience will try to regroup for next year but as I get older and most of my friends have walked down the aisle, I hope the TOR experience fades away like many bad memories.

I know that if I don't stop it now I'll be doing it at my daughter's wedding one day.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

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