Take on Trump’s Katrina moment

With one of the worst hurricanes our country has seen bearing down on the Florida panhandle, Trump decided to go to Erie for a campaign rally. We know that there is very little he can do in DC that he can't in Erie or in the air but the optics are W flyover Katrina bad.

But this is the president we elected, a guy who is more concerned to get showered with admiration while he berated evil democrats than the reality -or at minimum the optics- of being out of touch. What is especially shocking is that the hurricane is heading right into Trump country, this isn't happening to Miami or New Orleans but to places which are redder than Trump is orange. So the devastation will likely be on the one part of the Trump electorate he can't afford to lose.

Anyway, hope people evacuated and it's all not that bad but when Trump looks like an out of touch lunatic after this, don't say we didn't warn him


Oh yeah, the market also took a dump today, wonder if he'll mention that

Take on Nikki’s departure

As the world awaits the meeting between Nikki Haley and Trump we have a few theories to why she may have resigned so unexpectedly

- she was the author of the OpEd. This has been something that has been hypothesized for weeks, so not a big surprise. It is of note that I recall her vehemently denying writing it

- although this plays right into the above theory, maybe she has had enough and is taking a calculated stand here to jump ship in anticipation of 2020.

- Maybe the Kavanaugh thing really pissed her off

- she actually is taking over for Rod Rosenstein who was the first to resign last night

- she really was the one who ordered those curtains in the Ambassador suite apartment in New York City and she's been found out

- Trump Jr. hit on her and asked her for nudes

Take on KAC

Kellyanne Conway is a miserable human and her idea that American women see their husbands, sounds and brothers in Brett Kavanaugh seems to be perfectly set. Dudes have a horrible history of doing and saying horrible things and reminding American women that our newest justice is the worst of American men. This is probably an appropriate for this turn in events considering where we are.
So thank you KAC for reminding us that there are exactly three women on the court and all of them were brought on by Democrats.

Take on the poor decision.

There was no worse decision than The NY Times releasing the story of the lie that Trump is a self made billionaire story. Not because it shouldn't have been told but because they released it -after a year and a half of diligent work- in the midst of the Kavanaugh confirmation hearings. This was the work of three reporters who apparently worked tirelessly to piece together the entire scheme and it got about a half a day of airtime. It's a example of the nature of Teflon Don Trump since every scandal is followed by another one that wipes the first one off of the map. We've been here before and nothing ever means anything but this was particularly sad as it undercut the main message that (less than) half of this country fell in love with this lunatic.

Take on terrible pants

Indiana Melania showed up in Egypt today and made another fashion statement. The pyramids served as her backdrop as she was interviewed for something or other where she likely didn't say anything of any value

People have commented on her outfit as it seemed a bit ridiculous but I'll say, she's a pretty woman but those pleated khakis make her look like she's five hundred pound and four foot nothing. The jacket is stupid in its own right and the Seinfeld level puffy shirt is horrible (the hat is cool and I kind of like the Reservoir Dogs thin tie) but the pants are just awful, they make it look like she has an ass in the front. These thing should be burned to the ground along with her granny panties.

Take on the spineless one.

Susan Collins has made a career out of appearing like she's a moderate and claiming to think about an issue in nonpartisan way but when push comes to shove she's no less moderate than Mitch McConnell or Paul Ryan.

There is no senator who has gotten more out of her seemingly ability to see past party lines and has delivered on that ability less than Collins. She is weak in the knees and stands for nothing other than true GOP orthodoxy which would be fine if she didn't try to play it both ways

At least Mukowski has a spine

Take on Bart Kavanaugh

Somebody got to Brett Kavanaugh and told him be better show some contrition but instead he penned an oped where he said he might have gotten too emotional. No shit Sherlock, you were weeping like a baby bud sadly nobody bought it. We all know you've lived a privileged life and have likely spent more money on hookers and blow than the rest of us will earn in a life but know this.... be glad your high school and college (and post college and shit your last week's) private conversations were not recorded somewhere because is there any doubt in m that you used the N word very liberally in your youth. This is like getting a car at 16 when you go to private school, ingrained racism is a right of passage Although to Trump's base that might be a badge of honor and not a demerit.

Take on the annoying alert

At 2:18pm everything changed. At that point we all
one of those Amber Alert FlashFlooding things that turned the entire office into a frantic phone search but instead of a missing kid of an underwater road, this new method allows the federal government i.e. the President, to text everybody simultaneously if there is a terror attack or another emergency. But there is nobody who didn't think that Trump wasn't somehow considering this for political gain. You just have a feeling that the next time there is an Access Hollywood type tape, we might all get a warning about a heightened alert or if the polls aren't looking promising then you can see him calling some kind of national emergency.

If this was truly a national emergency warning method, why not have it sent from FEMA instead of from the president. How about if he's incapacitated at the time, does the alert still go out??

But this is who we elected, a child with his finger on the trigger

Take on Trump Country

This is who leads our country, this is who our young boys and girls are suppose to looked up to, this is who should be the guiding light but instead we get Trump.
A guy who writes love letters to Kim Jung Un, a guy who has perpetuated more conspiracy theories than Alex Jones, a guy who mocks disabled reporters, embarrasses able bodied ones, one who fights with our allies and embraces our enemies, one whose closet isn't big enough to hide the skeletons and the one who can say anything and nobody flinches.
His little rant about Dr Ford today is the antithesis of class and is exactly what you'd expect out of him

Take on our misogynistic president

Trump is a total pig and the group of white dudes who stand behind him ready to felate him at a moment's notice should all be hung by their tiny testicles.  

Trump decided to be Trump today, fresh off of his rebranding of NAFTA, he took the opportunity to insult a woman doing her job like only he can.  And like the guys who hang with the high school bully, his group of unathletic lackeys just stood behind him and laughed.  

Trump: "She's shocked I picked her, she's in a state of shock"

Reporter: "I'm not, thank you Mr. President"

Trump: "I know you're not thinking, you never do"

Reporter: "I'm sorry?"

Trump: "Go ahead"

Mnuchin in the back is likely he happiest dweeb out of that collection of old pasty white ballsacks because you just know Trump would give that squirmy twerp the Jeb! treatment if he ever turned around. 

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Take on Kanye.

Years ago people would always speak about Kanye West like he was the next great musician. I've heard a half dozen songs and was never all that impressed and always found him sort of annoying. The George Bush hates black people thing was stupid, his fashion line sucks, he's always frowning and he's married to the worst type of people you can imagine. There was nothing funny or interesting about him but it became a thing for The NY Times crowd to feel like they needed to understand him. I never felt that desire thinking he was a moron way before it was cool to think so.

So when he jumped all over Trump during the campaign I wasn't that shocked, since he seems to care only about the shock value. This guy has turned into the black Marilyn Manson and he's scaring the avocado on toast side who so loved him for being so edgy just a few years ago.

I've been consistent and thought he's always been an idiot.

Take on the budding love affair.

Kim Jong Un and Kim Jong Trump fell in love over a warm (nuclear) fire kept ablaze by the bodies of millions of enslaved and malnourished North Koreans. I am never quite sure what to make of these two playing footsie but I have to admit it's better than the lover's quarrel they had two years ago. At least now the worst thing that could happened is Trump look like a love struck lunatic versus the other option which was basically staring down nuclear holocaust

But this is 2018 and this is our president, a guy who will rip staunch allies and embrace sworn enemies and not think anything of it. Because we all know that the way to Donald's heart is with a few kind words and a box of chocolates.

Take on Rudy’s supportive tweet

Rudy isn't that bright and seems to be losing it more and more each year

He tried to send out a supportive tweet of Graham but instead embarrassed himself like only Rudy can

His tweet

Senator Lindsay Graham distinguished himself today as the fairest man and the best lawyer in Washington. He voted for Justices Sotormayor and Kagen  on old fashioned principles. I also did. If he is going to vote for Judge Kavanaugh, the Senate all should.

Now class let's pick out where Rudy embarrassed himself

- he misspelled Graham's first name, not a big deal to screw that up for a guy Rudy probably says is a friend 
- he misspelled Judge Kagan's name indeed spelling it like some weird vagina exercise 
- he misspelled Judge Sotomayor's name but likely because he doesn't like anybody called mayor except him 

Listen I make plenty of spelling mistakes, probably have a few in this post but kids the real flaw in this is that he implied that he, like Graham, also voted for both of Obama's justices.


One small problems with this
Rudy never had an opportunity to vote for a judge because he, um, never actually was a senator.  He may have forgotten his ill faded attempt when it became clear that he would lose to Hillary.   You can't totally blame him as he may have confused that run with the couple of similarly disastrous runs for president

It's like Rudy lives in some alternative reality, one where he went from mayor to senator to president banging porn stars all the way.   Sadly he went from mayor to thrice divorced crazy guy standing on a street corner yelling about conspiracy and using racial epithets at passerby's just trying to get to work

Plus he got very fat

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Take on the Kavanaugh bearings

I spent the day following the Kavanaugh hearings and I have a splitting headache mostly because Brett the Jet screamed for about two hours straight. Kind of odd to try to present yourself as a companionate person who would never hurt a fly let alone a woman by screaming like a complete lunatic

and a few questions remain unanswered

- what happened at Lindsey Graham mother's house this morning to get him so riled up. It's like somebody killed one of his thirty cats. It's almost like Donald Trump has something on him. Oh what could it be???

- I'm not quite sure the idea was behind the Bill Cosby reference but not sure you want to portray Old Bill as anything positive

- Chuck Grassley is a horrid human who would doneverybidy some good by falling on a sword...literally

- for a guy who claimed during the Fox interview to not be much of a drinker, he certainly seems to like beers

- I don't think Renate will be sending old Brett a Christmas card this year. With "friends" like that, she wouldn't need any enemies

Take on the company Rudy keeps

The Daily Beast showed a photo of Rudy Giuliani kissing with a mayoral candidate in Toronto who happens to also be an anti Semitic white nationalist. Of course the uproar is about how a trusted adviser and attorney for our president could find himself in her company and what it means for an administration which has often appeared to play footsies with the worst of the worst

What's more bothersome is how stumpy Rudy has become over the last few years, he was never an ultra fit guy but he seems to be getting more troll like every time you see him. He wears these suits that make him look like Spongebob, he has faker teeth than this nazi chick has boobs and his entire face looks like he's got wrinkles on his fat like he is imitating a Cabbage Path Kid

Take on the laughing stock

Trump really does have the best words...just look at what he said back in August 2014 "We need a President who isn't a laughing stock to the entire World."
Right on cue, he told the UN that he had accomplished more than just about any other administration had in two years which was met with..laughter
What they don't realize is that he probably has done more...more damage to the environment, more trillions to our national debt, more corruption from top to bottom, more tax breaks on the eventual back of entitlement more abuse of power, more embarrassment and more of a laughing stock

So this Bud's for you, Don. Enjoy your moment.

Take on Judge and Jury.

Brett Kavanaugh went on state television today to admit the thing we all knew about him anyway. He was a virgin in high school and likely most of college. He's trying to use this excuse to give himself cover but the allegations so far are about sexual assault, not rape. So the only thing we have learned today was that he was a heavy drinker, who looked like a total nerd, who was a heavy mastrubator and never got any love from the ladies and now we're supposed to be surprised that he could possibly have assaulted a young girl. This is the definition of a guy who might be attempting something like that.
The more I think of it, this guy has Son of Sam written all over him.

Take on Kavanaugh’s little black calendar

Brett Kavanaugh rummaged brought his parents basement and was somehow able to come up with calendar from thirty years ago which do not show a party like the one described by Blasey-Ford. I'm not quite sure what to make of this, first of all it's hard to show how authentic they may be and second of all it hardly proves anything. Just because something is on my calendar doesn't mean I did it and not everything I do makes it on my calendar. He should really bust out his diary.

Two thought

- if it an authentic calendar, what kind of psychopath would actually keep it.

- if it is not an authentic calendar, it will be easily disputed as this loser will likely have put down "varsity football letter announcement" when he should have put down "clarinet practice"




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Take on Ted’s hack job.

Poor Ted Cruz, not only does it look like he's going to lose the election to a guy who skateboards and was in a punk band but at this point Cruz is actively campaigning for him. 

He posted the following clip https://twitter.com/tedcruz/status/1043278255740973058?s=21 and nobody can quite figure out if he was hacked, is just hoping to lose or is such a white supremacist that he doesn't realize his dog whistle was actually a bullhorn.    See Ted Cruz posted something and at first you are afraid to click on it as it seems like it will just bring you down some Alex Jones rabbit hole but instead it brings you into the heart of Beto which is nice.    You do also get to see how weird Beto is with his body mannerisms, the guy looks like he is having a seizure on stage with all his weird hand motions 

With any luck after Ted Cruz loses, he'll disappear from our consciousness and lives for ever but not before he gives a concession speech where he elbows his wife in the head a few times 

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Take on Susan Collins

I hate Ted Cruz and Grassley and the rest of the stooges but at least they are honest. Susan Collins is Lucy to our Charlie Brown as she repeatedly gives the impression she cares about things like healthcare and women's reproductive rights and...morality and every single time she pulls the football away from us.
She, along with her counterpart in Alaska her more mileage out of their airtime than anybody would ever imagine, and considering they both come from states with relatively small populations, their ineptitiute is even more striking

Time to clean house