Hipster vs New Father

It is sometimes difficult to tell the differences between races. It's not uncommon for somebody to confuse a Korean and a Chinese person although for those of us who can tell the difference the game is as easy as shooting fishheads in a barrel. There are other groups that are difficult to distinguish from one another including Native Americans and South East Indians, Swedes from Nords and Hipsters and New Fathers.

I'll leave the Indian and Northern European discussions for another day but I wanted to give you some information to help you distinguish the other two. Now they share a lot of characteristics including the thick bags under the eyes, general crabbyness and self perceived importance.
BUT there are a few ways you can tell a new father from a new Hipster, you just have to know what you are looking for.

Although they may dress and look similar to the untrained eye the expert can make important inferences with the quickest glance

See although both may wear a hoodie, the hoodie strings for the hipster will be headphones while the hoodie strings for the new father will be only strings.

Pants
The Brooklyn father and the Hipster will both wear a pair of jeans which both probably haven't been washed in months and both will be a tight. The difference is the hipster's will be purposely tight while the new Father will just have put on a few pounds

CellPhone
Both will likely be buried in their IPhones and both may be using the camera.. the difference is that one will look like he's examining nature using the camera while the other is preoccupied with instagram

Then if you look at the apps on their phones you'll see the father has FishSchool while the hipster just downloaded the new Conan app.

Hats
both may wear a baseball-hat though one will probably wear an NFL hat while the other wears a mesh trucker hat.

Homefront
Both the new dad and the hipster will likely make his dwelling in Brooklyn, the difference is the former will come from Park Slope while the latter comes way of Williamsburg

Boots
Both may be wearing boots, the difference is one may have spurs on them while the other has snow boots that don't breath.

Haircuts
Both will have a disheveled hairdo. One will have spent hours on making sure it's perfectly disheveled while the other will just look like crap.

Social Networking
Both the new father and the most cutting edge hipster will have shunned social networking. One will be done with it as he feels his time is better spent with other things while the other has disconnected to fight the power

Pickles
Both love pickles, one buys them from the farmers market while the other pickles veggies himself

But the easiest way to confuse them is based on facial hair. See where both species will likely have some facial hair, the difference is that the new father will wear a scruffy beard while the hipster wears the porn 'stach or a full bushy beard.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry