unlike wine I don't age well

I'm still a bit confused about a few things but one of the things I'm very sure about is what happens to people when they get hammered... They do funny things..not funny ha-ha but funny "I took your Mahi Mahi and then told you that they ran out and instead you got my cold herb-crusted chicken"

I've been a big drinker since I was about 18 years old when I really fell in love with beer at that Yankee game with my buddies but since then I've given up wine and almost all hard liquor. My body just doesn't seem to handle other alchohol well, the hangovers are so much worse now that years before and nothing gives me a bigger morning headache than shitty chardonay. I can't kick the beer although I was able to make it 2 weeks without a beer recently. Alas it was a short-lived streak as it came to a bitter end last night and for the first time in a while, I suffered from booze not from a lack of booze. See I got to dinner, put down a couple of Brooklyn Lagers (a beer which is way too dark and heavy for a lazy humid Saturday) and then finished if off with a shot of sambuca in my double espresso. The problem isn't so much the two beers, the one shot or the 2 pounds of pasta I consumed but more the combination of all of it. Somehow in the last couple of years I went from dude with an iron stomach to a guy who wakes himself (and his poor wife) up by flatulence and the runs. I was laying awake last night wondering what happened to the good old days when I used to have eating competitions at Sizzlers and Gray's Papaya cause cause now my stomach can't even handle a cozy dinners of Shrimp Fra Diavolo.

It's like I got old overnight, my knees hurt, I wake up to take a leak and I complain about the modern athlete being a bunch of lazy slobs.


but i'm not ready to go into dirty-old man territory quite yet, I read something on the interwebs just last week which I totally agree with

there is no doubt in my mind that a hot 30 year old woman is more attractive than any 18 year old can be.

SO the way I see it my love of older women is keeping me young!!!