Pulling Out Sucks

Two days in Seattle and all the major sights covered (Mariners, Bruce Lee grave Jimi Hendrix statue, the troll under the bridge) and now off to a banquet with 240 chinese wedding guests and my back feels like Kung Fu Panda tap-danced on it.
Imagine running 18 miles then flying 3000 miles and when you hit the hay that night you realize you've gotten screwed by having drawn the short straw and stuck on the pull-out couch. As much as an air mattress sucks, some how a pull out couch is worse. That bar is perfectly positioned for the small of your back; guaranteed to have me walking 3/4 crouched the rest of the night. It's a cruel trick because if I were to just sleep on the couch itself I'd probably feel great, but because its a transformer I feel obliged to sleep on it when fully pulled out.
I an convinced people buy these things to LIMIT the time house guests will stay over; it's the perfect unvitation. 'Come stay over our place, you can sleep on the pull-out.'
When you are given this invitation just realize that your suitors are not interested in having you stay over and there are good chances they'll ask you to help with house chores.

How the hell do they expect me to drop to my knees and rip through my undershirt when I am walking around like an 80 year old incontinent man?

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