Take on the NYC mayoral race

New York city will elect a new governor soon and it looks like the chances of winning go in an order something like Andrew Cuomo, Curtis Sliwa and Eric Adams. This is a despicably bad offering and we have to be embarrassed that this is the best we got. I can't say I know anything about Zohran the Mandalorian but he's got to be better than that three headed monster.

Take on the Meatheads text chain


Our national security team is run by a bunch of meatheads. We get that they didn't mean to add a reporter to their text thread but the fact they are communicating that way in the first place seems ludicrous. What i am sure about is that the "But Her Emails" crowd will be super quiet this time around which just shows them for the cowards they are. I know the James Carville theory of just waiting to let these idiots implode seems like a pretty good bet but not sure our country will be recognizable if we go that route.

Take on The Trump portrait

Trump is all pissed off about some portrait hanging in the state capitol in Colorado I can't imagine him having time to complain about something like this but when you are as vain as he is, it does make sense. I'm not sure what the best course of action would be but to think that this guy has spent significant time both complaining about this and negotiating a settlement between Ukraine and Russia is insane

Take on the south

When you get to the south they tell you that you should not use your cell phone within 25 feet of a gas station which sounds totally ludicrous. I'm all for curbing cell phone usage but this seems as arbitrary as having to turn your phone off on a plane. We need sensible laws and rules not Big Government breathing cos our backs

Take on George Foreman

George Foreman dying had me messed up on two levels. First of all, he was obviously an incredible boxes who I only saw the tail end of his career when he was fat. But even then, he seemed like he was sort of unstoppable. Not because he was fast or nimble but because when he did, he hit you like a freight train. But of course my biggest memory of him is the grill which turned this dude into John Madden II.

Take on the DOE

Trump signing another executive order, this one is to dismantle the department of education. In a country where we constantly feel like we are falling behind in education, this seems like a terrible move if only for the optics. Japan and China aren't cutting education, Europe isn't either. But here we are, the country that has already told the woke we are science skeptics, taking the next step and basically just saying screw it, we are what we are.

Take on the end of the metro cards

When MTA announced it had gotten rid of metro cards, it was clear to me that I didn't realize they still existed. I'm not purist but the metro card was never as cool as the token, I doubt there will be a nostalgia behind them and honestly doubt they will be missed. Although that reminds me that I think I still have like $6 on my card which is good for like a half a ride by now.

Take on the fall from grace

Nobody has fallen from grace faster than Elon Musk. It's not just that he's somehow flipped the script on himself going from a liberal darling to a full on Nazi, it's that he's done it with no regard to his own reputation. I guess when you have a couple of bucks in your pocket, you can feel that confidence. Sadly though this dude will never be happy, he can never find the right amount of money to buy any kind of joy.

Take on the World's most Famous vomitoriun

It must be nice to be Tracy Morgan. You just show up to a Knick game, pay a child's admission, act all crazy and then puke up your dinner. I can't imagine living g his life but there is no way some average Joe barfs on the court and they just clean it up and go on their way. Jim Dolan would have them expelled for life and probably would shove them down a flight of stairs for good measure.

Take on the commander in cheat

Trump won his own lame golf tournament today, with videos of him picking up puts and shanking balls into the woods. We don't honestly care and I'm totally fine with him blowing off some steam but the entire thing is so embarrassingly awful to think he wants to brag about this

Take on the not normal.

I'm not sure I can do another 3 years and 10 months of this. Trump has spent the first part of his second term, destroying the entire institution. I get that this was the Steve Bannon playbook and I also know that they have this thing mapped out to a t. What in shocked at is the impotence of both the democrats and the main steam republicans This isn't normal and these people will have to live with this for their political careers.

Take on the Starbucks settlement

Some dude in an F-150 is going to get $50,000,000 for spilling a Pike Place Roast on his groin and here I am slaving away daily with a 3 hour round rip commute I don't care what the damages are, getting $50M for an unsecured top is asinine. Please god, I hope this guy buys a gigantic cup after he collects his winnings and the barista makes sure his kid is once again not totally down.

Take on Chuck Buck Schumer

God. Chuck Schumer sucks. He's been back at his position of not doing anything of value but sounding like a total moron while doing it. He's a spineless loser and the fact he's got any support is shocking to me. I wish they'd send this clown out to pasture

The on the conservative green car

There wasn't a conservative who would have been caught dead in an electric car yet now they are all tripping over themselves to get closer to Elon. Hannity is the latest loser to fall into the trap after Trump make the Tesla cool for the lunatic crew. I don't like rooting against the Tesla stock because we all have a lot of our 401ks and investments tied into it but god, if it can drop just a bit more maybe the Tesla's board of directors has some guts and appoints a new leader

Take on Elon and Trump's infomercial

Trump and Elon did a joint infomercial for Tesla today which completely erases any hope for impartiality. Here is Trump picking winners in the global car race and getting everybody to listen to his reasoning. This is the kind of activity that would have gotten FoxNews into a panic a few years ago but now they are likely providing play by play. I'm so sick of all of this, can we just got back to the old guy who would forget where he was every now and then?

Take on the fresh crash

When your entire persona is about showing strength you better have the balls to show up when things aren't going well. The stock market is in a tailspin, the world is questioning the new world order and we are destroying our infrastructure from the inside. I get that this is what we apparently wanted but at what point do we start winning and not looking like a bunch of fools.

I'm 99% sure the stock market recovers as it alway does but maybe this is the exception because nobody likes instability.

take on the void

Kamala came out of hiding this weekend to start to poke fun at our chubby president. It wasn't innocent fun either, this was hard core political trolling by Kamala by using Trump's own words against him. We know the democrats can't seem to get their message out, they always just look defensive, meager or plain weak and I don't think they themselves know what they need to do I'm also not sure who is going to be able to deliver their message daily but right now that is an obvious void and it's time for somebody to step up.

Take on the Trump supporter who is now out of work.

Nothing seems more appropriate than a bunch of Trump supporters screwing around and finding out. I get that they aren't all that bright and we all saw this disaster coming like that giant boat and that iceberg but the fact that anybody is surprised that their messiah isn't exactly kosher, needs to repeat the class

Take on the little person

I always knew Mike Johnson was a small man but seeing him on that manjuice stained FoxNews couch convinced me the guy might a little person. I have nothing against little people but when he is trying to compensate for lack of stature by being a total jackass, I lose all respect for the man and the position. When the history of the US will be written, at one point they will turn to the page of our present speaker and everybody will wonder why he was wearing lifts.

Take on the exploded payload

Rooting for any aircraft to go down seems legitimately sick but when that SpaceX exploded, it almost felt therapeutic. What Musk has done to our country in the last two months will be something we deal with for years and he's not close to done. The cruelty is only matched by the incompetence of their accounting system which is still nothing compared toy Elon's personal impotence which is why he feels the need to swing around a fake dick. We know there won't be a future for all of this but do think we are in for a miserable ride.