There is nothing like landing in Shanghai and going through the VIP section of security. VIP apparently means that the carpet is only partially stained, the Chinese people behind you are only slightly pushing you and the lady who runs that magic wand over your body only slightly slaps that stick on your nutsack. I get how important security is but the VIP portion is just laughable. The good news is the lounge feels like you are hanging out in Port Authority with a bunch on homeless people who are picking their teeth, digging between their toes and slurping their soup. Oh yeah, the bathrooms smell like just like the one on the second floor of the Port Authority, it's almost like being home.
You forgot to mention the public belching sounds without any belcher bothering to cover her mouth, the dandruff dotting the shoulders, necks, and oily hair of the people in line, and the beautifully clashing colors and patterns of puke yellow, scarlet red, teal, and gold sequin dragons on black print that al the women love to wear.
ReplyDeleteChina. What a paradise.