Somebody asked what Star Wars characters each candidate would most identify with, here goes the best answers
Trump. Han Solo, brash, loud, irritating and likes chicks in bikinis. In it for himself and will die alone having lost all his friend when Eric Trump stabs him on the catwalk overlooking the atrium at Trump Tower.
Carson. The easy answer would have been Lando Calrissian but he doesn't look Armenian enough, so the answer is... Yoda not because he is all knowing or because he has any hope of doing anything anymore (his time to shine was a long time ago) but because he speaks in such an odd manner that I forget what he is talking about almost immediately. The problem is that everybody tells you that he is this genius, you just don't really see it..
Cruz. The Emperor. There are two sides of the force and most struggle between dark and light, right and wrong, love and anger. Anakin fell to the dark side, Luke was tempted and Kylo Ren obviously fell too, so the distinction is not that clear even for the best Jedi...the one distinction is Darth Sidious, he is pure unadulterated evil, he has no redeeming values of good and his desires if ever fulfilled would destroy the Galaxy. He is that dangerous
Rubio. Darth Vader. He is a puppet for the establishment, mostly because he is not that bright. A Total hawk but somehow believes that he is doing right by turning far right even if it means leaving behind all that he should hold dear but in the end, you know/hope there is still good in his heart
Christie. This is too easy. Jabba The Hutt. Christie is a loud mouthed gangster who desperately wants to get the attention of the real warlords.
Kasich. R2D2. Nobody quite knows what he is saying and it all sounds wonky and weird but it is pretty certain that he is the smartest one in the room
Big Mike Huck. One of those silly bears from Return of the Jedi, he looks cuddly and sweet but he probably smells like a wet dog and really is just in for the merchandise
Carli. I won't go the easy route so will go with that Admiral Ackbar that weird fish looking commander who helps the rebels blow up the Death Star II, she is just that ugly
Rand Paul. That little rat thing attached to Jabba.
Lindsey. Nien Nunb. Total twins (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Nien_Nunb)
(https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lindsey_Graham#/media/File%3ALindsey_Graham%2C_Official_Portrait_2006.jpg)
Scott Walker. Joe Skywalker, the lost brother with the weird eyes and the bald spot who dropped out of Jedi school after a week
Santorum, Jindal, Pataki completely faceless Storm Troopers
Jeb C3P0
Trump. Han Solo, brash, loud, irritating and likes chicks in bikinis. In it for himself and will die alone having lost all his friend when Eric Trump stabs him on the catwalk overlooking the atrium at Trump Tower.
Carson. The easy answer would have been Lando Calrissian but he doesn't look Armenian enough, so the answer is... Yoda not because he is all knowing or because he has any hope of doing anything anymore (his time to shine was a long time ago) but because he speaks in such an odd manner that I forget what he is talking about almost immediately. The problem is that everybody tells you that he is this genius, you just don't really see it..
Cruz. The Emperor. There are two sides of the force and most struggle between dark and light, right and wrong, love and anger. Anakin fell to the dark side, Luke was tempted and Kylo Ren obviously fell too, so the distinction is not that clear even for the best Jedi...the one distinction is Darth Sidious, he is pure unadulterated evil, he has no redeeming values of good and his desires if ever fulfilled would destroy the Galaxy. He is that dangerous
Rubio. Darth Vader. He is a puppet for the establishment, mostly because he is not that bright. A Total hawk but somehow believes that he is doing right by turning far right even if it means leaving behind all that he should hold dear but in the end, you know/hope there is still good in his heart
Christie. This is too easy. Jabba The Hutt. Christie is a loud mouthed gangster who desperately wants to get the attention of the real warlords.
Kasich. R2D2. Nobody quite knows what he is saying and it all sounds wonky and weird but it is pretty certain that he is the smartest one in the room
Big Mike Huck. One of those silly bears from Return of the Jedi, he looks cuddly and sweet but he probably smells like a wet dog and really is just in for the merchandise
Carli. I won't go the easy route so will go with that Admiral Ackbar that weird fish looking commander who helps the rebels blow up the Death Star II, she is just that ugly
Rand Paul. That little rat thing attached to Jabba.
Lindsey. Nien Nunb. Total twins (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Nien_Nunb)
(https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lindsey_Graham#/media/File%3ALindsey_Graham%2C_Official_Portrait_2006.jpg)
Scott Walker. Joe Skywalker, the lost brother with the weird eyes and the bald spot who dropped out of Jedi school after a week
Santorum, Jindal, Pataki completely faceless Storm Troopers
Jeb C3P0
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