Take on the adult move

Having now moved three times in the last four and a half years, I can
safely say that they aren't much fun anymore. Years ago I'd get a
bunch of my buddies to come out of a Saturday morning, load up a UHAUL
and lug it from one crummy apartment to the next. It would cost you
the price of of the UHAUL, a case of beer and 5 pies (my friends are
gavones) and then hear them bitch and moan about how heavy everything
is....it was great and cheap. What wasn't great was that two months
later, you'd get a call from one of these guys to help him move and
now you were on the receiving end of the pizza, blow and booze but
you're back would feel like one of your buddy's sat on it. We'd have
a bunch of laughs though, mostly when we'd break the couch trying to
squeeze it through a doorframe because we were hungover to measure it
or when we spill a full diet coke in their laundry basket because we
are too busy checking out a hot chick living next door
Now I'm 38 with a mortgage, two kids and one on the way and a much
busier schedule, so I pay a bunch of dudes to do it. Can't say that I
am a huge fan of laying out $1765 but also couldn't possibly imagine
asking my friends who all have kids of their own to do this for me
anymore

Although honestly, the reason that I don't ask them anymore is
because I don't want them to call me for it either.