take on the SOTU

We watched the State of the Union Address with bated breath yesterday just waiting for that water-cooler moment... little did we know that we'd have to wait until Marco Rubio's Republican Response to get anything worth talking about at all..   Rubio, who some are calling the presumed front-runner for the 2016 GOP ticket pulled a Bobby Jindal on his biggest stage and we at TOR think his sweating, water-chugging and facial tic-ing may have torpedoed his chances at the highest office in the land

We did have the following observations throughout the night

Joe Biden's pink-eye was really distracting, if you are going to rub your eye after wiping your ass, please wear an eyepatch

Boehner licking his lips and wiping his face like he was waiting to dig into a huge bucket of KFC was more than a big creepy

John Kerry really looks like he needs to groom his ear-hair and eyebrows, nobody is going to take him seriously dressed like father from American Pie 

Sandy Levin wears a ridiculously long tie looks like he's trying to cover up some piss-shaking spots

Somebody has to tell the Speaker that wearing one of those button down shirts with the buttons for the collar when wearing a suit is a fashion faux pas

John McCain looking like he just won the lottery in one second and like he's going to kiss a man the next

Janet Napolitano looks way too much like Miss Piggy to wear pink

Eric Holder looks like he could be a character in The Americans

Michelle Obama gets way too much credit for being so well dressed, she looks like an uncomfortable teenager and she's got a terrible haircut 

Chuck Schumer looking PSS (ParkSlopeSmug) in his orange tie and 'just give me a BJ already" grin

Ruth Bader Ginsberg- may just have dropped dead, she was definitely drooling although it was better than last year when she fell asleep

Just because Sonia Sotamayor and Elena Kagan have the exact same political view does that mean that they have to have the same haircut too?

Eric Cantor always looks like he smuggling a tire-iron in his five hole

We never got a view of Ted Nugent but I did see a picture of him sitting next to the gayest, most liberal congressmen in the entire house.. 

Susan Rice has some terrible eye liner, she looked like Marilyn Manson meets The Little Mermaid

Obama's fist bump with conservative congressman  Manchin was a bit too much bipartisanship for my flavor 

Nancy Pelosi has a really terrible haircut, she looks like she got it done by the guy who cuts the hair for Cindy Lauper

but of course the most memorable part of the entire night is Marco Rubio looking like a complete sex offender