A stage Freud must have missed

What the hell is up with people who refuse to look you in the eye when they speak with you and worst yet what the hell is the deal with guys with these wimpy handshakes?

I saw a friend's facebook status update the other day which described an encounter with a colleague or a friend who shook her hand like he was extending a dead fish. The weak handshake feels like you are forced to help some dude deal with his psychosexual inadequacies and I'm not getting paid enough for that.
Now I won't criticize it as just being unmasculine but I will criticize it for sucking and not masculine..

See Freud described various stages of childhood psychosexual development and described how stages of oral and anal development not realized as a baby lead to various types of future levels of sexual deficiencies and deviants.. If it so to be believed than a baby who isn't allowed to suck on his toes may end up running away from home and sucking on some dude's toes somewhere in a seedy bar in the village.

Freud (and Jung) go into great detail about the various phases including the ones that describe the Oedipus complex but somehow the theory neglected to describe which phase is tied to a guy not being able to shake a hand. This unrecognized phase (the touch phase) which allows a child to explore not being a total insecure pussy obviously leads to not being able to squeeze your hand later in life and can lead to being passed over for promotions, potential in the life and love but most importantly make people in his life think he's hiding some secret sexual deviants because of this discomfort

There is also the guy who squeezes too hard which completely feels like they are trying to compensate for some other inadequacy.


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