Friday, June 5, 2009

the Delta at the end of the Puddle of Piss


As I'm waiting at the Columbus airport having just driven 650 miles through the rust belt from Pittsburgh to Cleveland to Columbus I am met once again met with the predictable LaGuardia delay.   Sometimes I feel like flights to LaGuardia travel on Brazilian time, 45 minutes later than it says on your invitation.

But what really bothered me was I just went into the pisser and saw the pilot taking a leak at one of the urinals .   The issues with this were three folds.

1) He was using the kid urinal, you know the one at about shin height useful for Mini Me or a three year old.   Now I have used the kiddie pisser a few times, BUT NEVER WHEN I WAS THE ONLY GUY IN THERE.

2) This dude didn't just have his pants unzipped, they were all the way down to the floor basically wrapped around his ankles.   Now if he was developmentally challenged this would not have fazed me but this guy is due to take me 3000 feet into the air in 20 minutes so unless this dude has a good reason like he's got a John Holmes size weasel tucked into his airplane socks I am a bit nervous.

3) Lastly I am not 100% sure but I don't think he washed his hands.  Now this is not nearly as bad as a poppy being sloppy moment but who wants to have his pilot peeing at the little urinal with his pants to his ankles cause you know if he does the first two things he is bound to piss all over his hands.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

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