Wednesday, August 6, 2008

So I dropped my walkman in a porta-john today


On my run this morning I realize that the 6 beers I had last night are not sitting as well as I expected (god-damn unfiltered wheat beer) and starting to wonder if i'm gonna make it all the way home.. Good news it's the #1 variety which leaves me with many more options, my run around Prospect Park does have two porta-johns which sit a the south part of the park and probaby are used by prostitutes and drug users which doesn't bother me nearly as much as guys who piss all over the seat in these things. Really can't you be bothered to at least jimmy the seat up with your sneaker so that if i gotta plop down i'm not soaking up your piss with my ass

Problem is that as I go in and I manage to drop my walkman on the nasty porta-john floor of this thing, here i am, shorts down to my thighs screaming and hollering as this thing just lays there.
I have another 3.5 miles to run and really I can't do it without a little distraction, so I go back to my memory banks and remember that human urine can disinfect your foot if you have athletes foot (more on this later), i pull out the old Righetti wanker and piss all over the walkman, fish this thing out of this puddle of piss and proceed on my run..

42 minutes for the 4.67 loop in this humidity is not bad



by the way I ran a poll at the FFA a few weeks ago on this public toilet situation

Do you put the seat up in a public toilet?
Public Toilet only
Yes .. I don't like to go where I could sit [37.18%]
No .. I just aim for the middle [24.36%]
No.. I aim for the rim [2.56%]
No.. I aim for the floor [1.28%]
Depends.. my intentions are good but sometimes hygiene takes over [17.95%]
Depends.. if I don't like the place I don't lift [2.56%]
I don't care because I would never use public toilets for #2 [6.41%]
other [7.69%]

since i know you are interested in my take on this thing
I will always use my foot to lift the seat so as to not make a mess of a place I may have to sit, although I know that most other people just go and splish splash all over the place

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